The core principle of Brave Dating is dating to discover who you are. My beautiful participant who has allowed her story to be shared has learned a lot about herself. A lot. And it has been good.
That doesn’t mean it hasn’t been without pain. Or disappointment. Vulnerability is involved. Vulnerability is a necessity.
But it has been worth it.
This led her to write up her standards of what she expects in a growing relationship. These are the boundaries she is putting around herself. There is a little vanity in these boundaries. The ones who will date her are going to know exactly who she is.
Overall- these don’t have to be apparent on date one but must be there in order of official relationship status.
1. He is Christlike, he is a spiritual leader.
2. He is a gentleman.
3. He must be intelligent and more importantly intellectually stimulating.
Coffee & Date One:
1. He asks me, he plans, and he give notice (3 days), he pays.
2. He is brave.
3. He is respectful.
4. Date one – if it went well a good night kiss on the front porch.
5. He has a job.
Between Date one and relationship status.
1. Notice is still necessary (some leniency in the timing)
2. Faith background needs to be showing.
3. Kissing still occurs on the front porch- no kissing inside my home (or his)
During the relationship.
1. No sex until marriage. However kissing can occur inside my house (and his)
2. He supports and accepts all of me as I support and accept all of him.
3. Relationships are purposeful and intentional, leading to marriage.
These are her boundaries, they may not be yours. But they may be a foundation to inspire you to write yours down.
At this point, she is declaring that she is forever going to be a “crazy book lady.” My response, “Nah. You won’t. You are too much of a good catch.” She really is.
Remember, you have everything inside you that someone is seeking.
(Photo credit: https://static.pexels.com/photos/65121/pexels-photo-65121.jpeg)
Originally published at Bravester with permission from Brenda Seefeldt Amodea.