Comfort, Rest and Temper Tantrums — Broken & Hopeful

Sometimes I throw temper tantrums about my life.I might as well be a 2-year-old with the fits I can have concerning all the things I feel I should not have to be experiencing, the comparisons I make to find myself lacking, and the struggles of others I want to wish away. I get mad at God, at the situation and at myself. It’s really hard for me to understand rest in the middle of struggle. The problem with this mentality (besides the fact that I look silly throwing a tantrum at my age) is that I’m claiming something that isn’t mine to claim. I want to tell God that I’m supposed to be happy and comfortable. I want to look at others, comparing my life to theirs and find myself the superior one. I want to get rid of all the hard situations in my family and friends’ lives, allowing them to move forward in peace and prosperity. But none of these are God’s promises.In fact, He promises suffering, struggle, fleshly desires, sin, discomfort, sorrow…and peace. What?! He talks about resting, about fearing nothing and about renewing our minds. None of this, though, is exactly what I’m looking for most days if I’m honest. I think this is because His priorities and goals are much bigger than mine—much more long-term. He would rather I struggle financially a bit than never know His provision. He would rather I fight through the grief of a lost marriage or friendship than never know His comfort in sorrow. He would rather I sit in the loneliness of despair than never understand His peace that passes all understanding. It is through these hard things that we really know anything—even people. We don’t really know a person until we have gone through a struggle with them. The same is true of God. We don’t know Him to the extent He desires until we have known Him through some hard stuff.So, the suffering has a point. And there is a way to know His rest, peace and even joy in the middle of suffering. That seems far-fetched sometimes, doesn’t it?When I was doing labor and delivery classes while pregnant with my first child, I remember the teacher saying that the way to make it through contractions naturally (without any medications) was to relax everything in your body and refocus on something other than the pain. And I thought she was nuts. That made no sense whatsoever. It took considerable practice to be able to relax my body completely while there wasn’t any pain at all! How was I supposed to do it when my contractions seemed to be killing me?I also remember in the thick of labor, being aware suddenly that although the relaxing and refocusing didn’t take the pain away, it made it bearable and reminded me of the reason for the pain—a baby! As I relaxed and let the contraction do the work it is intended to do, I could feel less frantic and refuse fear. My second birth was actually incredibly exhilarating, not because it wasn’t painful—believe me, it hurt. But because I wasn’t scared. I knew that relaxing in the middle of the pain and refocusing on a safe place allowed me to move toward the goal, which was having that little baby in my arms.Whatever the struggle is for you today, will you rest into your Father’s capable arms and let Him be what you need for it? You don’t have to fight or wrestle or fear. You simply have to rest. That sounds really hard some days, I know. I still want to throw a tantrum about whatever the suffering is for me or those I love. But in resting and refocusing on Him, you don’t get rid of the pain altogether, but it becomes bearable because you are letting God empower you instead of fighting to try to work it out on your own.My good friend Mike Wells used to talk about having Christ on one hand and problems on the other. When the hand with the problems was right in front of my face, the problems were all I could see and I lose hope. When Christ is my focus, though, my problems don’t go away, but are put in proper perspective. We begin to see the problems through the lens of Jesus’ Life within us rather than being overwhelmed by them.The picture at the top of this post was a tree I found in the middle of the forest on a hike in southern Colorado. It amazed me. The thing was completely broken, and yet still alive and green. It had been broken for a while by the looks of it, but still continued to grow and produce green needles. Sometimes when I want to be mad about the way my life is “turning out” I need to remember this tree–broken but not dead, and standing as a living symbol of suffering not being the thing that ends us.What suffering or problem is overwhelming you today? Are you stomping your foot about it being unfair or different than the life you planned? I get it—I do the same thing. But I find the more helpful way to be to refocus on His Life and rest in Him. This is abiding, and it allows the Life of the Vine to flow through us to deal with all that surrounds us. I am convinced that any suffering we endure is less than nothing compared to the magnitude of glory that is about to be unveiled within us. The entire universe is standing on tiptoe, yearning to see the unveiling of God’s glorioussons and daughters!  For against its will the universe itself has had to endure the empty futility resulting from the consequences of human sin. But now, with eager expectation, all creation longs for freedom from its slavery to decay and to experience with us the wonderful freedom coming to God’s children.  And in a similar way, the Holy Spirit takes hold of us in our human frailty to empower us in our weakness. For example, at times we don’t even know how to pray, or know the best things to ask for. But the Holy Spirit rises up within us to super-intercede on our behalf, pleading to God with emotional sighs too deep for words. Rom 8:18-21; 26