This is Love: Foster Care and Siblings


This very special post was on my daughter’s Facebook.   I just had to share it with you, with the hope that it will help get the message out, help bring awareness to the need for Foster Families, and answer a question that so many ask.

May is National Foster Care Month. We often get questions about Fostering, and if you’d like to know more about what it looks like please message me.

One of the common questions people have asked (and we did too!) is…

”Doesn’t it take away from your biological kids?”

The answer is “yes”. It does. My kids have to share time, attention, toys. They’ve had to miss out on activities, vacations, playdates. They have adjust to a new child’s schedule. They have had to deal with tired and worried parents who struggled to play with them as much as they used to.

They’ve had to learn the terribly painful lesson that life isn’t about them.

I have seen them struggle to navigate peoples’ questions and opinions. I have watched their eyes well with tears as other children told them she’s “not your real sister”. I have answered questions about things most kids their age aren’t yet exposed to. I have guided them through tears, frustration, anxiety. And I have listened to them pray for their sister’s unknown future.

I have also seen them grow in maturity, in selflessness, in compassion. I have watched them become more flexible, more resilient, less judgemental kids. I have notice them bond over their shared experience. I have watched a brother and a sister fall in love with this baby who needed a home.

There are kids without homes. There are kids who need a safe, loving place for a time or sometimes for ever. And IF God calls you to this, He also calls your kids.

And it may be the greatest way He could ever “take away” from them.

“Pure and undefiled religion before our God and Father is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself unstained by the world.”  James 1:27