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    Blaming you for the emotional affair – Divorce Minister

    David Derksen,

    If the cheater blames you for their emotional affair… …be aware that they will have no problem blaming you for a physical affair, too! This is one of the many reasons to take an emotional affairs seriously. Once the cheater feels embolden to believe lies about emotional affairs–namely, they are not responsible for such sin–then … Continue reading "Blaming you for the emotional affair"

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    Cheater concern about you never “getting over it.” – Divorce Minister

    David Derksen,

    “If we stayed married, you’d always hold this over my head,” says Cheater. Cheater Concern About You Never “Getting Over It” What I find interesting about this response is how the Cheater shows he or she understands the infidelity has forever impacted the marriage. They understand that they cannot go back to how things were. … Continue reading "Cheater concern about you never “getting over it.”"

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    When a cheater claims the marriage was “toxic” – Divorce Minister

    David Derksen,

    Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV Did I miss something? When I read this verse–part of the Ten Commandments–I don’t see where it says, “Thou shalt not commit adultery unless [you believe] your marriage is a toxic relationship.” I don’t see it because it is NOT there! This is an especially lame cheater excuse or … Continue reading "When a cheater claims the marriage was “toxic”"

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    Adultery is always sin! – Divorce Minister

    David Derksen,

    Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV So much energy is often spent trying to “understand” why a cheater cheated. Such energy–especially in churches–is better spent teaching what the Bible teaches–namely, adultery is ALWAYS unacceptable. Circumstances matter not. Adultery is ALWAYS sin. I wonder how many marriages would have been saved this trauma (and … Continue reading "Adultery is always sin!"

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    But Christ pursued a spiritually adulterous people heresy… – Divorce Minister

    David Derksen,

    True, Christ pursued a spiritually adulterous people… AND… Christ told a spiritually adulterous group of people to go to Hell (see Mt 25:41). One of the tired use of the Scripture for faithful spouses is the example of Christ pursuing the Church. The faithful spouse is shamed and browbeaten into staying married to an entitled … Continue reading "But Christ pursued a spiritually adulterous people heresy…"

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    Repentance required to avoid Hell – Divorce Minister

    David Derksen,

    The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. -2 Peter 3:9, NIV While this verse is more about Christ’s second coming, I figure it is a good verse to talk about end things in general. … Continue reading "Repentance required to avoid Hell"

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    Cheater-Speak: “I’m not divorcing you because of him.” – Divorce Minister

    David Derksen,

    “I am not divorcing you because of him [Other Man].” -Adulteress Busted. And then the cheater busts out this mind messing statement. What is the cheater doing by making such a statement? They are doing several things. All them are bad, of course. In general, it is a particularly heinous thing for a cheater to say after … Continue reading "Cheater-Speak: “I’m not divorcing you because of him.”"

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    It takes two… really?! – Divorce Minister

    David Derksen,

    Random Christian: Sure, she cheated on you. But you know, it takes two to tango. DM: That only applies if you have two willing and able dance partners. She clearly is not willing and possibly not even able to “tango” with me. The “It takes two to tango” line is a subtle blame-shift upon faithful … Continue reading "It takes two… really?!"

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    Manipulators with mad skills are cheaters – Divorce Minister

    David Derksen,

    Test all things; hold fast what is good. -I Thessalonians 5:21, NKJV A master manipulator knows how to take a potential weakness and work it into a strength. They know how to leverage a situation. Cheaters are master manipulators, IMO. The speed at which a cheater can turn a confession of infidelity into a discussion … Continue reading "Manipulators with mad skills are cheaters"

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