12 Signs A Woman Is Not Sexually Satisfied In Her Marriage - Olubunmi Mabel

My friend once told me about one time she and her husband were out at a family event, and a few hours into the event, her husband sent her a raunchy text message that destabilized her for minutes.

Do you know those messages where a man goes into detail about how attracted he is to his wife and what he wants to do with her?

Suddenly, she couldn’t concentrate anymore; the music being played and the variety of food before now seemed like distractions.

She just wanted them to go home.

The text had evoked the memory of their lovemaking two days earlier, and something in her belly kept leaping.

She wanted to go home as fast as possible to experience that again.

So, a few minutes later, she apologized to their host and cooked up a story about something she and her husband had to attend to.

She grabbed his hands and hurried to the car, almost dragging him.

Need I mention what happened afterward?

Her previous sexual encounters with her husband and the satisfaction they brought were the obvious reasons for her response that night.

When a woman is sexually satisfied, it shows, and when she’s not, there’ll also be signs.

A lot of women endure sex in their marriages, unfortunately, and because some of them don’t expressly say it, their men assume that they’re satisfied.

Part of the job of a good husband is satisfying his wife’s sexual needs, so if she’s not sexually satisfied in her marriage, her husband needs to be able to identify the signs and do something about it.

Wondering how to know that a woman is dissatisfied with the sex in her marriage?

Just keep reading.

12 Signs A Woman Is Not Sexually Satisfied In Her Marriage.

1. She complains about her sex life.

signs a woman is not sexually satisfied in her marriage

This is one of the most common and obvious signs, yet some husbands still fail to notice it.

When a woman expresses dissatisfaction, even in the most subtle way, about the sex she had, believe her.

Some women are vocal about their feelings and needs, and if the sex doesn’t meet their expectations, they’ll tell you.

They may say it in different ways because people differ; some women say it outrightly.

Others may resort to criticizing their partner’s performance; another category of women may compare the sex unfavorably to past experiences, etc.

However, she chooses to say it; listen to her.

If you fail to listen, the next point may follow.

2. She becomes withdrawn, unhappy, and easily irritable.

Sex is meant to be a pleasurable experience, and when she sets out to do it with her husband, there are loads of expectations building up within her.

When those hopes are dashed, don’t expect her to be happy.

She may become upset, have mood swings, or even withdraw from her husband.

If she’s complained about the experience and didn’t get a response, it makes everything worse.

The feeling of unfulfillment can make her emotionally detached from her husband, pulling away from him subconsciously.

She easily gets provoked, and her husband is an irritant to her.

All of these may be caused by the frustration and unhappiness in the sex life.

3. She doesn’t experience orgasms

signs a woman is not sexually satisfied in her marriage

I once went through the comments under a post made on a women-only Facebook group, and the number of women under that post who confessed to faking orgasms constantly in their marriages was sad to see.

They do it to make the men feel good and so that the sex can just stop because it’s not hitting the spot for them.

A wife who fakes orgasms constantly is a wife who isn’t sexually satisfied in her marriage.

This doesn’t necessarily mean that the sex is bad and should be condemned and thrown in the bin; it may just mean that the man doesn’t understand her body well and isn’t getting to her G-spot.

A husband should not just be focused on his orgasm and reaching climaxes; he should also pay attention to ensure that his wife’s needs in that area are met.

Even if the sex is good, if she doesn’t experience orgasms, she’s not getting the full experience out of it and most likely isn’t satisfied.

4. She avoids talking about sex.

While some women choose to grab the bull by the horns and tell their husbands when he’s not getting it right in bed, there’s another breed of women who choose just to keep mum.

Not only will they keep mum, but they’ll also actively avoid the subject.

If a woman is actively avoiding intimate conversations with her husband, you should raise an eyebrow.

A wife should comfortably have discussions with her husband about her sexual needs, preferences, or fantasies.

If she avoids it, it may be because she’s not enjoying that aspect of the marriage, she doesn’t feel comfortable enough, or something else is wrong with the sex life.

5. She loses interest in sex and intimacy.

signs a woman is not sexually satisfied in her marriage

If the sexual experience is continually subpar and she complains about it to no avail, she may begin to lose interest in it.

You know when you look forward to something with so much excitement but end up having a disappointing experience? Your excitement will take a downward spiral, especially if it keeps happening.

When a woman loses interest in sex and seems not to care about it anymore, it’s most likely pointing to unfulfilling past sexual experiences.

She’s not just avoiding physical touch, hugs, kisses, and cuddling for no reason.

Her minimal effort during sexual encounters and lack of enthusiasm and involvement in them is saying something.

Her husband should probe further and try to resolve it.

6. She’s uncomfortable during sex and unhappy after it.

Unless it’s her first few times having sex, experiencing any form of discomfort or pain during the act is not normal.

It could be pointing to a lack of arousal or unpleasant past experiences.

This is one way to know that a woman isn’t sexually satisfied.

You may also observe that she’s unhappy after the act.

She’s not smiling and curling up into your arms; she’s just rigid or even unhappy.

That’s not a sexually satisfied woman.

7. She seeks alternatives.

signs a woman is not sexually satisfied in her marriage

When the person who should be meeting this vital need is not doing so, she may try other options.

Cheating is an inexcusable offense and is unhealthy for any marriage, but sometimes, it is fuelled by something.

If a woman is engaging in sexual activities outside of her marriage, it could be because her husband is not getting it right.

She may not go into full-blown cheating; she may still be at the level of fantasizing about being with someone else, having different sexual experiences, or even helping herself through masturbation.

Or she may be comparing her sexual experience with other people, whether real or imagined.

All of these can indicate a lack of fulfillment in her marriage in that area.

8. Constant fights.

A sexually dissatisfied woman is an angry woman sometimes.

All the buildup of sexual energy and not getting a proper outlet for release can create frustration, which she may express to her husband in different ways.

She may become overly critical, angry, and less tolerant.

Her dissatisfaction stops being only in the area of sex; it spirals to the overall relationship.

Once this is noticed, it needs to be addressed and discussed, and practical solutions found.

Otherwise, it could spiral into resentment and other unhealthy feelings.

9. Attraction declines.

signs a woman is not sexually satisfied in her marriage

She no longer feels drawn to her husband or admires him like she used to.

This is because he’s not getting it right in the sex department.

This is a vicious cycle because sexual dissatisfaction leads to loss of attraction, which leads back to sexual dissatisfaction or no sex at all.

10. She feels insecure.

If a wife is not getting the experience she wants out of sex, her self-esteem may take a hit.

She may start doubting herself, no longer sure of her attractiveness and confidence.

She wonders if something about her is responsible for her experiences.

She becomes more self-conscious and insecure, which may all stem from a lack of satisfaction in the marriage.

11. She’s stressed.

signs a woman is not sexually satisfied in her marriage

Sometimes, good sex that hits all the right spots is the best way to de-stress.

If a wife is experiencing physical symptoms of stress, like feeling demotivated, headaches, or stomachaches, it may be linked to an unsatisfactory sex life.

It could be indirect in that the underlying tension or dissatisfaction in the marriage is making her stressed.

Or it could be direct; the buildup of unmet sexual desires could be taking a toll on her physical body.

Yes, sexual satisfaction is that important.

12. She focuses on other things.

signs a woman is not sexually satisfied in her marriage

When a wife ignores sex and willfully gives her time and attention to other things, it’s possibly because the sex is not great.

She hasn’t had the best experiences from it in the past.

So, rather than stress herself and utilize her energy on something that won’t be rewarding ultimately, she’d rather focus on work, hobbies, or other activities.

She’s doing this as a way to distract herself from their dissatisfaction with the marriage.

This is not a lasting solution to sexual dissatisfaction; neither is any of the other points mentioned above.

The way out is to have a conversation about the situation: expectations, desires, preferences, past experiences, everything!

And for both parties to commit to making each other get through the best sexual experience.

Women are different, and the signs they will exhibit when they’re sexually unfulfilled can vary, but they would usually revolve around the ones mentioned in this article.

Whatever the sign is, it’s best identified early and addressed.

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