8 Obvious Signs A Man Is Not Sexually Satisfied In His Marriage - Olubunmi Mabel
Personally, I wouldn’t like to have sex on the floor with anyone.
Have you run out of more comfortable places to have sex?
Ever heard of the cool and comfy bed?
The bathtub?
Or the shower, even if that could be a dicey affair…
The fact is that quote reflects sexual fulfillment, and while I may not want to have sex on the floor, it reflects that if couples are thoroughly satisfied sexually, they may find themselves doing things they never planned on doing.
The sad thing is that one partner can enjoy sex without the other partner being satisfied.
So, even if you are satisfied with your sexual experience in the marriage, is your partner satisfied as well?
Sexual dissatisfaction can be the root cause of many issues in marriage: unresolvable conflicts, disrespect, or downright cheating.
How do you know when your husband is not sexually satisfied in the marriage, especially since he doesn’t come right out to tell you that he isn’t feeling the sex with you?
There are various signs a man is not sexually satisfied in his marriage, and all you need to notice them is to know what to look for.
To help you with this, we have taken the liberty of compiling certain signs that a man is not sexually satisfied in his marriage.
Come along; let’s hopefully rule these signs out of your marriage.
8 Obvious Signs A Man Is Not Sexually Satisfied In His Marriage
1. He doesn’t orgasm
Here’s the most obvious sign of sexual satisfaction.
This is because a male’s orgasm is usually linked with a release of semen.
However, there are times when males release semen without reaching orgasm.
Most of us have, at one time or another, had to fake an orgasm just to convince our partners that we enjoyed the experience.
Yeah, males do this, too.
Though, it is admittedly not as common as females pretending to reach orgasm.
However, if you notice that your man doesn’t reach orgasm most of the time, it is a sign that he is not getting the sexual satisfaction he needs.
The most obvious sign that a man doesn’t orgasm is the fact that he doesn’t cum even after you have orgasmed.
This may not mean that the sex is not good because a combination of other factors like stress, anxiety, and distraction can stop a man from enjoying sex.
Find out what it is.
He could also have a condition that causes delayed orgasm.
Finding the root cause of the delayed orgasm may be the key to helping him attain satisfaction through sex.
However, if the sex is just not exciting enough to get him to “cloud nine,” then you need to sit together and discuss your preferences towards sex.
2. He seems to be drifting from you
I have seen people say things like, “Sex doesn’t really matter; couples need to love each other against all odds.”
I totally get it.
Love is powerful but not the only ingredient needed for a successful marriage.
There is trust and intimacy, which can be emotional or physical.
Both forms of intimacy are equally important and interwoven.
So, if your husband isn’t sexually satisfied, he may begin to distance himself from you emotionally.
You may not understand why, but it is almost inevitable.
If you notice that your husband is being distant in the relationship, it could be a sign that he is not sexually satisfied.
However, you shouldn’t just jump to conclusions because your husband may be emotionally distant from you for several other reasons.
To truly know if the reason is sexually related, you need to combine this sign with the next sign…
3. He seems mechanical about sex
I know you are enjoying the sex, but there is still one part of you that wonders if he is fully present.
He seems mechanical about it, and this may be his way of dealing with the disappointment of past dissatisfactory sexual encounters.
He is now at that point where he intentionally dissociates himself when he is having sex with you, so he doesn’t feel the disappointment much.
It is a coping mechanism that most people employ when they have been disappointed by a person one time too many.
They don’t really believe in anything the other person promises anymore.
We engage in sex because of the promise of pleasure and satisfaction, but when you don’t get to feel that satisfaction, you may become indifferent about it.
4. He randomly switches things up
When I was younger, I learned that the best survival skill you can have is understanding body language.
It made people think I was a gentle child even when I wasn’t.
I could read the elders’ body language, so I knew when I could get away with being naughty and when I couldn’t.
This is also applicable to marriage and sex.
Sex is a highly intimate act that makes you familiar with your partner’s body and emotions.
Of course, that’s when it is done the right way.
When having sex, you should be attuned to your partner and able to anticipate their needs.
Beyond this, you should also be able to know when they are not satisfied with the things they do.
So, let me give an example.
You are giving your husband a blow job, and he suddenly switches up and doesn’t allow you to repeat the action.
It is obviously a sign that he may not be deriving the pleasure he is supposed to from the oral sex.
This may be because your teeth have been punishing him or something.
Reading his body language during sex will tell you when he is satisfied and when he isn’t.
5. He no longer initiates sex
Of course, every married couple has periods when they don’t have sex at all.
This could result from the stress of work, the additional responsibility of caring for the children, and the occasional need to make time for family and friends.
However, if your husband specifically doesn’t initiate sex anymore, it could be a sign he is not sexually satisfied in the marriage.
When a man enjoys sex with you, he would initiate sex frequently, and he may do it in the oddest places.
He could start making advances right from the kitchen…
Or the living room.
Or any other weird places y’all do it.
But when he doesn’t initiate sex anymore, it is a sign that he may not be sexually satisfied in the marriage, and hence, he sees no reason to put in the effort.
6. He goes to bed earlier than you
Usually, your husband stays up at night to keep up with the news or sports.
But he no longer does this.
He goes to bed really early.
Sometimes, even earlier than the kids.
It is a sign that he is avoiding going to bed at the same time as you.
This may be because he wants to avoid sex with you.
At least, if you come in while he is sleeping, you won’t want to wake him up just to have sex with you.
And even when you do, he can always say he is too sleepy to consider doing anything.
7. He flirts with other women
This is another sign that a man is generally dissatisfied with his marriage.
There are many men who are naturally flirtatious.
However, when a man gets married, he must control that impulse to harmlessly flirt with an attractive woman.
Your husband had put a tight rein on his flirtatious tendencies for a time.
Suddenly, it seems like he has taken the leash off and is even flirting much more than he used to.
If this is happening to you, the first place you may want to look at it is what is happening in your sexual life.
Is your sexual life exciting?
Do you feel like your husband enjoys having sex with you, or he just seems to go through the steps like a routine?
If this is how your sex life feels like, flirting with other women could be a sign that your husband is not sexually satisfied in the marriage.
8. He is easily irritable
Really, I understand the pain of being under intense sexual tension without any outlet to give you satisfaction.
Intense pressure from work leaves you with a terrible headache, fatigue, and a short temper.
Unreleased sexual tension leaves you feeling frustrated with life itself.
You may even wish that you didn’t have genitals in the first place.
When a man is in this mood, he is easily irritable.
He criticizes everything you do and may say terrible things to you.
This is actually not an intentional attempt to be mean to you.
He is just giving expression to the frustration he feels within him.
These are some of the signs that a man is not sexually satisfied in his marriage.
What do you do if you see the signs in your husband?
First, you must know what the source of the dissatisfaction is.
Could it be a result of unmatched expectations?
Discuss your sexual expectations with your husband and compare them to his.
Perhaps he wants something you are not giving.
As long as he is not asking for a threesome or something degrading, you can always find a way to compromise.
Display flexibility and a readiness to satisfy his needs as long as they are reasonable.
Ensure you are doing all these from a place of love and not out of fear that he will cheat on you.
If a man would cheat, he would cheat on you regardless of whatever you do.
While you are at it, don’t forget to love yourself.
Self-love will prevent you from doing anything that endangers or degrades you.
After all, if you don’t love yourself, how can you expect others to love you?
You can also explore seeing a sex therapist to help navigate the issues.
All the best.
