MENTAL HEALTH MONDAYS: Five Ways to Stop Feeling So Inadequate - The DV Walking Wounded:

There may be times when we question whether we are “enough.” We may wonder if we are good enough for our friends, our family, our job, and the lifestyle we choose to lead. We may start feeling inadequate. This is ESPECIALLY true if you’ve ever been through a toxic relationship and/or abuse.

Although this is not a great feeling to have, please remember that it is only temporary. It allows you to do some self-reflection, focus on all the positive parts of your personality, and allow those feelings of inadequacy to dissipate!

Let’s take a look at how we can positively change these feelings. Here are 5 Ways to stop feeling so inadequate: 

• Remind yourself of your successes: Sometimes, all it takes is a moment where we remind ourselves how far we’ve come, what we’ve achieved, and those we have in our lives who care for us.
  • Draw up a list of everything you are proud of: Consider any educational courses you’ve taken, achievements from your job, and the activities, events, books, television shows, and even clothes that you like and appreciate. 
  • Write down everything that allows you to identify yourself as unique individual.
  • Doing this allows you to look at your achievements, your likes, and dislikes, and all the different aspects of your personality that make you relevant, important, and interesting. 
  • Writing these ideas down can help you to condense, collate and organize your thoughts and remind yourself of just how far you’ve come in this difficult world!
  • It is far too easy these days to compare yourself to everyone else. 
  • Whether it’s on social media, conversations with our friends, or just judging somebody who is walking down the street, we all tend to compare ourselves to somebody else.
  • It’s time to stop those comparisons. They are unhealthy and toxic and will cloud your judgment with negative thoughts. 
• Understand that you are unique: Remember the previous suggestion, where you write down your successes, likes, and dislikes that define you as a person. 
  • It’s a great way of reminding yourself that you have your personality and shouldn’t be comparing yourself to anyone else. You are enough as you are, right now, in this moment! Your uniqueness make you uniquely you! Otherwise, you’re just another lemming!
• Widen your social circle: This may sound somewhat counterproductive, but it could be that some of your friends in your friendship group have inadvertently made you feel inferior or inadequate. Keep in mind toxic traits that the people in your circle may be exhibiting.
  • Consider trying to meet new people with new points of view. They will be less likely to judge your lifestyle or your choices and they can get to know you for the individual that you are. 
  • Don’t ignore your current friends, just gain a wider circle with new points of view!
• Do something for yourself: Whether you want to go on vacation for a while or you want to start a new hobby, take the plunge and do something different.
  • You’ll feel much more in control if you dare to take a chance and do something for yourself. You won’t feel inadequate, instead, you’ll feel excited and full of purpose. 
• Take a social media “detox”: On social media it’s easy to compare ourselves to others in the same way we compare ourselves to other people in person.
  • Consider deactivating or taking a break from social media for a while and allowing yourself to live in the moment and enjoy everything that you have around you. 
  • You may just want to limit social media. Consider blocking people that are toxic or make you feel “less than.” If you don’t want to block them entirely, you can hide them from your timeline, which might ease seeing things that could trigger your inadequacy feelings.

When we feel inadequate, it can be hard to shake that feeling off. You just need to make sure you don’t compare yourself to others and you live your individual, authentic life to the best of your ability. You’re not in a contest with anyone, except yourself. Just strive to be better than you were yesterday! That’s really all you can realistically do!

Love and light! <3