Shifting from Me to We

Someone owes a few of us an apology. For years, we baby boomers were negatively portrayed as the Me generation. Tom Wolfe labeled the whole decade of the 70s as the Me decade, but we Boomers were coming of age, so we carried the brunt of the label. We were considered narcissistic and self-focused. It was a time of self-realization and self-fulfillment.

I’m not saying we didn’t deserve some of that, but we were monks compared to today’s culture. In fact, Time magazine labeled our current crop of Millennials as the ME ME ME generation.

On a test measuring narcissism, college students in 2009 scored 58 percent higher than students in 1982.
Forty percent of millennials in the workforce think they should be promoted every two years, regardless of their job performance. Remember, this is the generation in which every kid on every team got a participation trophy.
Their every move was first rerecorded on VHS and now on mom’s smartphone. And in an era when reality shows make stars of anybody, they carry around the subconscious (or unspoken) notion that they are the center of life’s show.

I don’t want to be the old codger who fusses about these pesky kids today. The blame for many of the faults we find in the millennials lies in us, their parents! We’re the ones who coddled them; we’re the ones who repeatedly told them they were rock stars. We wanted to boost their self-esteem, but perhaps we went too far. In trying so hard to boost self-esteem, we boosted narcissism instead.

This isn’t just a generational thing. This self-centered focus Millennials inherited from the early generations is prevalent throughout our society. It’s not limited to one generation. We’re seeing this throughout our society, and what we’re losing in this shift is a focus on the community. We don’t think about others. We don’t think about our connections to others and our need for one another.

Consider this. In the past twenty-five years:

Patriotism has dropped from 70 to 38 percent. A shared connection to other citizens is unimportant.
Interest in having children has dropped from 59 to 30 percent. A shared connection to family is unimportant.
Involvement in the community has dropped from 62 to 27 percent. A shared connection to my neighbors is unimportant.
Involvement with religion has dropped from 62 to 39 percent. A shared connection to God is unimportant. [Source]

While I can bemoan the loss of patriotism and the lackluster community involvement, a person can live without those. But we can’t live without a connection to God. We can do business, shop, and carry on work from the isolated comfort of our cellphones, but there is no true life apart from God.

That’s not to say people aren’t “spiritual.” So many people define themselves as spiritual, but defining what that exactly means is vague and hazy. And to be clear, I’m not a fan of religion per se. Institutions and dry traditions mean little, but a vibrant connection to God as revealed in Scripture … well, I need that—and we all do!

People don’t feel their need for God because they’ve dulled their senses with the white noise called social media. I’ve got the world at my fingertips thanks to my iPhone, so what else do I need? But the constant scrolling through Instagram, binge watching, and garnering likes on our posts is not fulfilling. In those moments when we can’t find what we need in the little world we’ve built around ourselves, where do we look?

“There is a way that seems right to a person, but its end is the way to death” (Prov. 16:25).

“It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in humanity” (Ps. 118:8).

Look to Jesus. Trust Him. Build your life on the One who loves you. The life He calls you to is a life of obedience, but under His gracious lordship, you’ll find contentment. Fulfillment. Hope. Security.

I’ve discovered something fascinating in this. Looking beyond myself to Jesus also restores a sense of community within me. When I stop looking to myself to make me happy and I look to Jesus, I also start to look at those around me. Life becomes more than just about me. It leads me to see others, to love others, and to be involved in the lives of others.

“Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their efforts. For if either falls, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up” (Ecc. 4:9-10).

“Carry one another’s burdens; in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ” (Gal. 6:2).

That’s moving from me to He to we.

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