Taking in the Good

Posted by: Frank Walker LMFT | April 30, 2019

Taking in the Good

Rick Hanson PHD, talks about the negative bias that we all have and the results of that bias in our lives.

Part of that bias comes from our brain as it uses input to adjust to life. We see here and store negative information to survive and react to dangers and harm.

Because of this are brain acts to negative stimulus much like Velcro and 75% of the negative information sticks.

However, on the other hand positive information is short term and slides off like Teflon in a pan.

This negative bias is a reactive mode and this mode is overriding in our world right now.

This causes us to not have high expectations. To not get our hopes up.

Much like the seed in Luke’s gospel we become choked by the worries of the world.

Luke 8:14 “and the seed which fell among the thorns these are the ones that heard and as they go on their way they are choked by the worries and riches and pleasures of this life and bring no fruit to maturity”.

Hanson makes these recommendations for what he calls, “Taking in the good”. Much of what we think and do is by our choice. What we choose becomes our trait.

1. See, hear, feel good facts and notice the good facts. Honestly there are good facts out there. Then, prolong the positive experience, linger in the good. Get the experience to stay in their mind.

Galatians 5:22

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

2. Stay with that positive fact for 10, 20, 30 seconds.

Prolong the experience. Let the mind absorb it.

3. Prime the memory system. Sink it in. Make the memory more sensitive.

Psalms 23:6

Surely goodness and mercy (loving kindness) will follow me all the days of my life, And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

 John Gottman the renowned therapist states that it takes 5 positive good experiences to overcome negative thoughts.

So, it is imperative that we develop taking in the good. Especially because we have been geared toward the negative biologically and by choosing the negative.

Our brains form a structure of dealing with information in three ways.

• From outside stimuli.

The stuff that comes at us from our surroundings, where we live, the feelings we get from people, place and things.

• Rearing

Your family has a great deal to form your thinking, attitudes and behaviors.

• You, taking control.

Here lies the part that can really change you and how you perceive the world. You have control over what and how you think. You can take control of all of this stimulus that is coming at you.

1. Internalize the positive experience.

Bring yourself back to the experience, go deep in.

Slow down, stay with it.

Keep these good thoughts and experiences in your memory to offset any negativity that comes your way.

2. Practice it, hang out in your good thoughts and feelings.

3. Take some actions to ensure you are taking in the good

Make a log of good things or write them in a journal.

Frank J Walker LMFT

Frank is a marriage counselor living on the central coast.

Check out all his blogposts at

walkertherapy.wordpress.com

and check his YouTube channel

“A Marriage Minute”

@ Frank Walker LMFT

http//youtube.com/c/FrankWalkerLMFT

Frank’s has written several books that are available @

http://www.blurb.com/user/store/frankjwalker