Anxious about Hospitality?

By Elizabeth Prata

As keepers of the home, we women are often encouraged to invite or even expect others to visit our homes. The hospitality offered by Lydia, Martha & Mary, and the home of Mary the mother of John Mark (where Rhoda was so startled when jailed Peter showed up during the prayer gathering) are homes in the NT where women hosted gladly.

We are called to do the same: Titus 1:8, Romans 12:13, 1 Peter 4:9, 1 Timothy 5:10…

I quail at the thought. I am like many women, who would be afraid to host someone in my home when it is less than sparkling clean. I’d want it to be where everything is always put away and I have fresh flowers arranged just so in charming vases and fresh towels in the bathroom with rose petals on them waiting for the random friend to stop over. LOL. Well, that’s how I imagine it anyway.

Of course our homes are never like that. If we really live, we really have a house that’s lived in. Kids toys are all around, there might be – gasp! – dirty dishes in the sink, popcorn kernels in the couch, a pile of mail needing tending to, open books and magazines on the coffee table accompanied by empty mugs of coffee or sticky soda cans…

I remember the most hospitable person I’ve ever known. She isn’t saved. But she is a great wife and mom. Her stance was that she wanted to be the house her kids’ friends came to, all the better to keep an eye on her kids.

In her house were piles of clutter, worn out sofa, small rooms crowded with ‘stuff’ or oddly arranged. According to design rules, the place wasn’t suited for company. When it got to be dinner time, without a fuss the hostess would cook up a pan of scrambled eggs or baked beans from a can with brown bread (also from a can) and just hand it out on paper plates. Sometimes the husband or the grown kid would pull out a guitar or mandolin and we’d sing.

Anyone and everyone was always invited. Absolutely everyone was treated with warmth, respect, and dignity. And the hostess did collect oddballs, me included. But all were equal, loved, and given a place of acceptance. As I said, she wasn’t saved. She did all this effortlessly and created a safe space I’ll remember forever.

As Christians, we should do that and more. Now, it is certain we should do our best to have a clean house, or at least one that’s fairly picked up. We don’t serve food on dirty plates from unsanitary counters, or allow piles of laundry to get strewn as a tripping hazard. There is a balance between sparkling perfection and filthy hoarder.

But there is no need to panic if you’re asked to host a Book Group or a Bible Study or a Fellowship dinner in your home.

I saw this book on Marci Ferrell’s Thankful Homemaker site, here. It’s:

Having a Martha Home the Mary Way: 31 Days to a Clean House and a Satisfied Soul by Sarah Mae. Here is the blurb,

“Sarah Mae wants to let you in on a little secret about being a good homemaker: It’s not about having a clean house. She’d never claim to be a natural, organized cleaner herself―yet, like you, she wants a beautiful space to call home, a place where people feel loved and at peace. Where people can really settle in with good food, comfy pillows, and wide-open hearts. Is it possible to find a balance? “

I have not read the book, but I did read the 29 pages allowed in the Google preview. She seemed to be saying the right things and the tone was non-judgmental. If you find that you’d like to increase your hospitality, I’d say try this book. Here are some other resources-

Ligonier: How Can I Practice Christian Hospitality?

Christian Library: The Biblical Basis for Hospitality

Reformed Theological Seminary, 3-min video clip: Why is true Christian Hospitality so Important?

Start small, invite one lady over, or ask the mom who’s picking up her kid from your house to stay for a cup of tea. The key is love. Just love them.