David: Forgiving Others

Absalom’s revolt against David is a story of a son rebelling against his father. Absalom’s rebellion took place when David failed to act against Amnon for raping Tamar. Absalom and Tamar were brother and sister. Amnon was their half-brother. David’s rape of Bathsheba served as a precedent for Amnon’s incestuous rape of Tamar.

When David failed to punish his son Amnon for raping his sister, Absalom decided to do what his father had failed to do. Two years after that tragic event, Absalom developed a plan to kill Amnon. While celebrating a feast to which all the king’s sons were invited, Absalom ordered his servant to kill Amnon after he had become drunk with wine.

After the death of Amnon, Absalom fled from Jerusalem and lived in exile for three years in the house of Talmai, king of Geshur, the place where his mother was born. After three years in exile, Absalom returned to Jerusalem at the invitation of his father. But Absalom never forgot that his father had not punished Amnon.

After Absalom returned to Jerusalem, David refused to reconcile with his son, “Absalom lived two full years in Jerusalem, without coming into the king’s presence” (2 Samuel 14:28).

Absalom sat at the city gates and whenever people came to David for a judgment or ruling, Absalom told them that the king was not concerned about their situation, thus planting the seed of doubt about David’s effectiveness as king. Four years later, when Absalom was assured that he had enough support from the people, Absalom came to Hebron where the people proclaimed him king.

In order to avoid a civil war with Absalom, David decided to flee Jerusalem. Whether the withdrawal was simply a militaristic decision is not clear. Tony Cartledge writes, “The reader must wonder why David would choose to flee Jerusalem rather than make a stand in the city that was famed for its strong defenses. Perhaps David wanted the conflict to be fought on another battlefield, one that would not leave obvious scars for the public to see in years to come” (Cartledge 2001: 567–568).

Shimei’s Insults

Before David left Jerusalem, David had several meetings with people who had served with him. Although Absalom had been proclaimed king by the people, David’s actions show that he was still in charge. When David met with Abiathar and Zadok (2 Samuel 15: 24–29), David said to Zadok, “Carry the ark of God back into the city. If I find favor in the eyes of the LORD, he will bring me back and let me see both it and the place where it stays” (2 Samuel 15:25).

David entrusted the situation to God as he prepared to leave the city. After David left Jerusalem, “David went up the ascent of the Mount of Olives, weeping as he went, with his head covered and walking barefoot; and all the people who were with him covered their heads and went up, weeping as they went” (2 Samuel 15:30).

Although David left Jerusalem not to fight against Absalom, his departure was a sad and tragic event in his life. The weeping, the covered head, and the walking barefoot reflect David’s deep grief and self-humiliation. These actions were signs of mourning, affliction, and distress.

David’s distressful situation intensified when he came to Bahurim and a member of Saul’s clan whose name was Shimei came out to meet him, insulting and cursing David: “When King David came to Bahurim, a man of the family of the house of Saul came out whose name was Shimei, son of Gera; he came out cursing” (2 Samuel 16:5).

Shimei is identified as a son of Gera. Gera was one of the sons of Benjamin (Genesis 46:21). As a Benjaminite, Shimei belonged to the same tribe of which Saul was a member and he probably had given his allegiance to Saul and his house.

Bahurim was a village in Benjamin, located north of the Mount of Olives. When David requested that Michal, Saul’s daughter and David’s former wife, be returned to him, Patiel, Michal’s new husband, “went with her, weeping as he walked behind her all the way to Bahurim” (2 Samuel 3:16).

As David and the royal entourage passed by, Shimei hurled insults at David. When Shimei saw David, “he came out cursing. He threw stones at David and at all the servants of King David; now all the people and all the warriors were on his right and on his left. Shimei shouted while he cursed, ‘Out! Out! Murderer! Scoundrel! The LORD has avenged on all of you the blood of the house of Saul, in whose place you have reigned; and the LORD has given the kingdom into the hand of your son Absalom. See, disaster has overtaken you; for you are a man of blood’” (2 Samuel 16:5–8).

Shimei’s outraged behavior reflects the northern tribes’ discontentment with David and with what he did to the house of Saul. The people of Benjamin never forgave David for what he had done to Saul and his family. At the time Saul and his three sons were killed by the Philistines, David was a vassal of the Philistines, serving under Achish, one of the lords of the Philistines.

When the Philistines went to fight against Saul, the lords of the Philistines did not allow David to go with them. Achish said to David, “to me it seems right that you should march out and in with me in the campaign. Nevertheless the lords do not approve of you” (1 Samuel 29:6). The Benjaminites disapproved of David’s alliance with Israel’s enemy.

Although David was not responsible for the death of Abner, the commander of Saul’s army (2 Samuel 3:37) and for the death of Ishbosheth, Saul’s son (2 Samuel 4:8, 11), David allowed the Gibeonites to kill seven sons of Saul (2 Samuel 21:6). Only Mephibosheth was spared because of the covenant David had established with Jonathan (2 Samuel 21:7).

Twice Shimei accuses David of being a “man of blood,” a murderer, probably a reference to the blood of the house of Saul. Shimei believed that Absalom’s rebellion was a divine punishment for his actions against the house of Saul. Shimei said to David, “The LORD has avenged on all of you the blood of the house of Saul, in whose place you have reigned; and the LORD has given the kingdom into the hand of your son Absalom. See, disaster has overtaken you; for you are a man of blood.”

Shimei called David “a man of Belial” (2 Samuel 16:7 KJV). The Hebrew word belial is generally translated as “a worthless man.” The word is generally used in the context of offending a person. In the postexilic time, the word Belial became a name for Satan (2 Corinthians 6:15).

When Abishai saw what Shimei was doing, he said to David, “Why should this dead dog curse my lord the king? Let me go over and take off his head” (2 Samuel 16:9).

Abishai was one of David’s mighty warriors. The expression “dead dog” is an expression designed to offend and show contempt to a person. Abishai was angry at Shimei and was insulting him by calling him “a dead dog.”

David, however, did not allow Abishai to kill Shimei. David said to Abishai, “If he is cursing because the LORD has said to him, ‘Curse David,’ who then shall say, ‘Why have you done so?’ . . . ‘My own son seeks my life; how much more now may this Benjaminite! Let him alone, and let him curse; for the LORD has bidden him’” (2 Samuel 16:10–11).

David believed that Shimei was being used by Yahweh as a way to punish him. When Nathan rebuked David for his affair with Bathsheba, Nathan told David, “I will raise up trouble against you from within your own house” (2 Samuel 12:11). Absalom’s rebellion and Shimei’s insult were some of the troubles Nathan had predicted David would face.

David was willing to submit to the will of God. He said to Abishai, “It may be that the LORD will look on my distress, and the LORD will repay me with good for this cursing of me today” (2 Samuel 16:12). Brueggemann writes, “David is prepared to let the cursing go unanswered, not as an admission of guilt but as an act of faith” (Brueggemann 1990: 319).

David endured Shimei’s criticism heroically. At a very difficult time in his life, David took Shimei’s insult as a way to honor God by trusting that God would eventually revoke the curse.

Shimei’s Repentance

After Absalom’s revolt and after Absalom’s death (2 Samuel 18:9), a messenger came to David announcing the end of the rebellion, “Blessed be the LORD your God, who has delivered up the men who raised their hand against my lord the king” (2 Samuel 18:28).

After David mourned for his son Absalom, he prepared to return to Jerusalem. When David came to Gilgal (2 Samuel 19:15), Shimei, the man who had insulted David when he left Jerusalem, came to meet David again, but he did not come alone.

Shimei brought more than one thousand men from Benjamin. He also brought Ziba, the individual who was the steward of Mephibosheth, Saul’s son. Shimei came with a contrite heart, welcoming David back from his exile.

Shimei expressed his contrite heart by taking back the insult he had hurled at David. Shimei said to David, “May my lord not hold me guilty or remember how your servant did wrong on the day my lord the king left Jerusalem; may the king not bear it in mind. For your servant knows that I have sinned; therefore, see, I have come this day, the first of all the house of Joseph to come down to meet my lord the king” (2 Samuel 19:19–20).

Once again Abishai was incensed by Shimei’s words. He said to David, “Shall not Shimei be put to death for this, because he cursed the LORD’s anointed?” (2 Samuel 19:21). Shimei deserved to die because his words of insult against David were treasonous.

David, however, showed his magnanimous spirit by forgiving Shimei and accepting his apology. David told Abishai that that day was not a day of vengeance, but a day of celebration, “This is not a day for execution but for celebration! Today I am once again the king of Israel” (2 Samuel 19:22 NLT). Then David promised Shimei under oath that he would not die, that his life would be spared (2 Samuel 19:23).

David did not return mistreatment with mistreatment. By loving a man who had treated him as an enemy, David fulfilled God’s command not to hold a grudge, “You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against any of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself” (Leviticus 19:18).

Shimei’s Death

Shimei’s words had a profound impact on David. Although David forgave Shimei and promised to spare his life, David remembered his words until the day he died. Before his death, as his son Solomon was being anointed king, David remembered Shimei’s words.

In his advice to Solomon, David remembered what Shimei had done to him and the promise he had made to him. David told Solomon that Shimei was the man who “cursed me with a terrible curse on the day when I went to Mahanaim; but when he came down to meet me at the Jordan, I swore to him by the LORD, ‘I will not put you to death with the sword’” (1 King 2:8).

David’s words to Shimei were “You shall not die” (2 Samuel 19:23). David did not want to make a day of celebration a day of vengeance: “Shall anyone be put to death in Israel this day?” (2 Samuel 19:22).

David told Solomon that he promised to Shimei that he himself would not kill him: “I will not put you to death with the sword” (1 Kings 2:8). Even though David took an oath not to kill Shimei, the oath was not binding on Solomon. David said to Solomon, “But now, do not consider him innocent. You are a man of wisdom; you will know what to do to him. Bring his gray head down to the grave in blood” (1 Kings 2:9 NIV).

On the advice of David, Solomon confined Shimei to house arrest in Jerusalem. After Solomon became king, he summoned Shimei to come before him. Solomon told Shimei, “Build yourself a house in Jerusalem, and live there, and do not go out from there to any place whatever. For on the day you go out, and cross the Wadi Kidron, know for certain that you shall die; your blood shall be on your own head” (1 Kings 2:36–37).

When Shimei violated the demands Solomon had imposed upon him, Solomon told him, “You know in your heart all the wrong you did to my father David. Now the LORD will repay you for your wrongdoing” (1 Kings 2:44 NIV). For the violation of his oath, Shimei was put to death.

Application

My pastor, Jeff Griffin, Senior Pastor of The Compass Church in Naperville, Illinois preached a sermon on June 25, 2023 titled “David: Forgiving Others.” The sermon was based on 2 Samuel 19:15–23. Many of the ideas and concepts mentioned in the post above are based on Jeff’s sermon.

In his sermon, Jeff emphasized that David’s relationship with Shimei is a lesson on how to deal with hurtful people. The art of handling cruel and hurtful people, people who can cause a lot of harm to others, requires endurance, patience, love, and forgiveness.

Absalom hurt his father David, but David loved his son and forgave him. Shimei insulted and hurt David, but David endured his insult and forgave him.

Jeff noted in his sermon that dealing with hurtful people requires three basic attitudes. First people must endure mistreatment heroically. David honored God when he was facing one of the most difficult times in his life. People of faith view hardship as an occasion to worship God with enduring faithfulness.

Second, when enduring mistreatment, insults, and hurtful words, people of faith should not make attempts to get equal with the one who has done wrong. Instead, they should love those who act as their enemies.

Third, when enduring mistreatment people of faith should commit their case to God because God is a God who “does not leave the guilty unpunished” (Exodus 34:7 NIV). God is the God who brings justice in the world.

At the end of his sermon, Jeff quoted the words of Martin Luther King Jr.: “Have we not come to such an impact in our modern world that we must love our enemy or else the chain reaction of evil, hate begetting hate, wars producing more wars, must be broken or else we shall be plunged in the dark abyss of annihilation.”

Jeff concluded his sermon by saying that if we do not learn how to love hurtful people in a graceful way, we are perpetuating a cycle of hate that can destroy our world.

A Video Presentation

“David: Forgiving Others.” A Sermon by Jeff Griffin.

For the complete list of sermons of the life of David, read my post, David – The Life of a King.

For a complete list of posts based on Jeff Griffin’s sermons, visit my post The Sermons of Jeff Griffin.

Claude Mariottini
Emeritus Professor of Old Testament
Northern Baptist Seminary

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BIBLIOGRAPHY

Brueggemann, Walter. First and Second Samuel. Interpretation. Louisville: John Knox Press, 1990.

Cartledge, Tony W. 1 & 2 Samuel. Smyth & Helwys Bible Commentary. Macon: Smyth & Helwys, 2001.