How to Love Your Spouse When Your Nest is ALMOST Empty

We are celebrating 26 years together in marriage.

We’ve been blessed with two college-age children–a boy and a girl–who both live with us at home while they work and commute to class.

Our front door may as well be a revolving door as much as it opens and closes during a typical week.

Additionally, the four of us occupy a small apartment on the second floor of the seminary housing complex. To say we live in very close quarters would be an understatement.

Also, our bills are considerable during this season of life. From tuition and books to cell phones, to car insurance, to health insurance to grocery bills, we are spending the dollars like never before in our marriage. Fortunately, there are some great online resources and reviews to help us (a good one is consumersadvocate.org). 

The hours our kids keep are sometimes crazy. One is up early, the other is up late. It’s noisy, lively, and chaotic most days. And, much of the time, it is a lot of fun.

But, how do we love each other well during such a crazy season in life – this almost empty nest?

What do I do as a wife to make sure our marriage doesn’t get put on the back burner or neglected or ignored?

Can I suggest just four things that I do to try to love my spouse well?

Romans 13:14 says we are to, “Dress yourselves in Christ and be up and about!”

Just as I put on my workout clothes and tennis shoes before I go to the gym, I also take the time to “dress myself in Christ” before I head out the door.

How do dress in Christ?

• You spend time alone with Him.
• You pray and talk to Him about the day.
• Or, you read from the Bible and take some truths out to help you throughout the day.
• You just spend a moment being still before the Creator of this universe.
• You surrender your heart and your life to Him.
• And, you ask Him to fill you up – to dress you – for the day ahead.

Because I spend time with the Savior each day, I am “dressed” in Him for the day.

Filling up with His love makes all of my relationships better – especially my relationship with my husband and kids.

Colossians 3:12-13 tells us to, “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.”

Daily, especially during this season, I have to put on a spirit of kindness, patience, compassion, and humility. I choose to dress myself in a gracious spirit rather than a demanding or impatient spirit.

Flexibility is crucial at this stage of parenting and marriage.

Dinner plans change, dates change, cars are exchanged, keys get misplaced, accidents happen, and life demands flexibility.

Some of our favorite dates have happened because we’ve remained flexible.

“Oh, the kids aren’t coming home for dinner? Let’s go out!”

“Oh, the kids are both working late? Smooching time. Woohoo!”

“What do you mean the kids can’t go with us on this trip? I guess we will have a romantic getaway!”

Because I try to put on a spirit of patience and flexibility each day, I find that life is much more of an adventure than it is a burden.

There is much more laughter and fun when I stay loose.

You can read the remainder of this post today on my friend Lori Schumaker’s site where I have the joy of sharing a guest post.

To get to Lori’s site, click HERE.

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