Marriage Advice Your Mom Never Gave You, Day 4 — GRITANDFAVOR.COM

Don’t talk about your husband like he is a child.
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I’m always down for a good joke. I often laugh at the worst times… like one time when my mom was choking. That’s a story for another day. But there is a certain set of jokes that have always burdened my heart. And it wasn’t until I was married that I understood why. 
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Telling your mother-in-law that you already know how to raise kids because you are currently raising her son is not a good look my friend. Or claiming you have 3 children, the 2 you gave birth to and the one you married is rude and demeaning. These kinds of jokes or thoughts show ZERO respect for your spouse. What you say about your spouse speaks more about your heart than it does about the actions of your husband. A heart of sarcasm kills the joy found in your union. 
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I know it is just a joke and it is meant in good fun, but this kind of talk does not cultivate an atmosphere of “one-ness”. I’m fairly certain if your husband called you his child, you would lose yo’ mind on him. And rightfully so. Only when you give respect do you receive respect.
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It is never your job to parent your partner. When you speak of the ways you help him as a burden and indicate that he has childlike behavior, you are killing connection and intimacy in your marriage. Why would he ever try harder if you only view him as messy, incapable, and irresponsible? When you act in this manner you shift from helpmate to authoritarian. And that doesn’t fall in line with God’s greater plan for marriage. Maybe he doesn’t vacuum or load the dishwasher because when he does, you criticize his work. Maybe he doesn’t help with the baby because he feels insecure or you step in too soon. While you can’t change the actions of your spouse, you can change your REactions to your spouse. Letting your spouse make mistakes, while incredibly difficult, is a vital part of submitting to being his helpmate, not his mother. 
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Furthermore, your actual children are listening. They will hear how you respect or don’t respect your husband. Then they will rise to that exact level. Children provide a mirror to our own behavior. If you don’t offer your spouse respect, your children won’t offer their father respect. Consider that God would be more glorified by your silence than your sarcastic chatter. 
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Ephesians 4:29, Romans 14:19, Psalms 141:3, Colossians 3:18