The Trouble with Competitiveness

I’d rather not write this article. 

Anyone who knows me knows that competitiveness lodges deep within my bones. I want to come out on top whether playing tic-tac-toe or four-square, taking a test, or parenting my kids. I size up the competition and track the most likely path to victory. 

Of course, I don’t always win. I lose. A lot. But that doesn’t mean I like it. My flesh hates to lose, and I easily idolize victory. So, I’d rather leave this particular post unwritten. After all, someone else who doesn’t struggle so much in this area would probably be a much more credible source. Right? 

Could be. 

Or maybe those of us who struggle with competitiveness can grow together as I write from the trenches. I don’t think I’m alone in my battle against the idol of the “W.” Our society thrives on competition. But don’t think it’s just athletes who tend to become ensnared by this predator. For you, maybe competitiveness looks like . . . 

• Making sure you maintain a “Pinterest-perfect” house at all times.
• Taking a vacation to match your neighbor’s.
• Making more money than your brother.
• Getting the promotion over that guy.
• Pushing your kid to be the star of the team. 
• Writing a passive-aggressive note to the director when your kid isn’t given the star role in the production. 
• Going into debt to make sure you drive the latest model. 
• Holding a grudge against a newly-hired coworker who surpasses you at work. 
• Spending twenty minutes deciding on the perfect filter for the picture you’re about to post in order to garner the most “likes.”

Harmless Fun? 

Competitiveness comes in many forms, which is part of its sneakiness. And because of its prevalence in our culture, we can easily deceive ourselves into thinking that it’s really not such a big deal. Author Jerry Bridges names competitiveness as one of our “respectable sins.” And this respectable sin may seem fun for the moment but it’s anything but harmless. 

Maybe you think I’m making too big a deal out of this. It’s just a little friendly competition among friends! True, competition, in its rightful place, can be harmless. However, I’m not talking about “competition” in general as the problem. The problem actually goes much deeper. The dangerous vice is competitiveness—a heart attitude that demands coming out on top. A competitive heart will do whatever it takes to win and respond sinfully when it loses. It’s not just participating in the family fantasy football league or March Madness bracket challenge that’s the issue. Competitiveness takes those fun, harmless activities and turns them into an all-out battle for supremacy. 

But don’t take my word for it. 

Let’s Call It What It Is

The word competitiveness appears exactly zero times in the text of Scripture. No English version of the Bible includes this word even one time. And yet, because the Word of God is absolutely sufficient for all that pertains to life and godliness (2 Pet. 1:3; 2 Tim. 3:17), we should not surmise that the absence of this word means that Scripture has nothing to say on the subject. In fact, it deals with the topic quite explicitly. 

Instead of using the euphemism “competitiveness,” the Bible calls the sin what it is: bitter envy and selfish ambition: 

But if you have bitter envy and selfish ambition in your heart, don't boast and deny the truth. Such wisdom does not come down from above but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. (Jame 3:14–15)

Well. That escalated quickly. 

We just went from talking about a little “friendly competition” to something demonic! James cuts through all of our excuses and cultural posturing and calls a spade a spade—or, to be more accurate, he calls a sin a sin. The root of competitiveness—selfish ambition and the insatiable quest to be number one—is something the kingdom of heaven knows nothing about. Instead, this ugly heart posture comes from the ruler of this world—Satan, the prince of darkness himself. 

Gulp.

This is clearly not such a “little deal” after all. 

If we keep reading in James, we’ll see that the news doesn’t get a whole lot better—yet. He tells us that the end result of this insidious sin is not peace, harmony, and a garden of roses. Check out the next verse: 

For where there is envy and selfish ambition, there is disorder and every evil practice. (James 3:16)

Competitiveness is a breeding ground for conflict, chaos, and a whole raft of other sins. Embezzlement, adultery, deceit, anger, malice, gossip, complaining, quarreling—all of these sins can easily blossom from the seed of competitiveness. 

It’s not a pretty picture. 

A Wise Solution 

Thankfully James does not leave us in the pit of despair but gives us the way out. He begins the next verse with the most glorious word in all of Scripture:

But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peace-loving, gentle, compliant, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without pretense. (James 3:17)

James describes a life free from the snare of competitiveness, but he also hints at the fact that what he describes is anything but natural to us. This is “wisdom from above”: supernatural, divine. 

How are we supposed to get that? 

I’m glad you asked. 

Our hope lies in a supernatural birth and the putting to death of our “earthly, unspiritual, demonic” flesh. The hope for escaping the pit of competitiveness is in the gospel. When you embrace Jesus’ vicarious death on your behalf, you are crucified with Christ, and it is no longer the competitive, hot-headed you who lives, but Christ lives within you (Gal. 2:20). 

On the cross, Christ became all of your “disorder” and “every evil practice.” Meanwhile, the righteousness of Christ was credited to your account (2 Cor. 5:21). You’re a new creation. The old competitive, glory-seeking, ambition-driven, envious, and bitter nature is gone (2 Cor. 5:17). You’re now free to walk in newness of life (Rom. 6:4), no longer enslaved to sin (Rom. 6:6). 

The hope of the gospel allows you to embrace heavenly wisdom and the attributes that accompany it: purity, peaceableness, gentleness, reasonableness, and mercy, all of which characterize Christ. True wisdom isn’t found in getting ahead at any cost or “dying with the most toys.” True wisdom is found in embracing the upside-down paradigm of the cross. 

Instead of quarreling over whose recipe for pumpkin pie is the best, seek peace. 

Instead of blowing your stack at the referee of your kid’s hockey game, listen to reason. 

Instead of finding a way to one-up your coworker in order to advance your own career, show mercy. 

Instead of tailgating the car in front of you going slower than you deem necessary, respond in gentleness. 

I know. It sounds foreign. Crazy. Ludicrous. Absolutely absurd. Such responses make you look like a doormat, just waiting for someone to walk all over you. But that’s monkey wisdom (which isn’t very wise at all). 

In the opening of His most famous sermon, found in Matthew 5–7, Jesus tells us what the good life is really all about. It’s in these Beatitudes that we see that the way up is down. As you read them, you’ll notice a striking resemblance to the true, heavenly wisdom found in James: 

“Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for the kingdom of heaven is theirs.
Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
Blessed are the humble,
for they will inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they will be called sons of God.
Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for the kingdom of heaven is theirs.” (Matthew 5:3–10)

Far from harmless, competitiveness can reap a whirlwind of trouble. However, because we’ve been transformed by the glorious gospel, we can embrace a better, albeit countercultural way: the way of Christ. 

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