What Does It Mean When Your Husband Ignores Your Feelings? - Olubunmi Mabel

Feeling unhappy in your relationship is one thing; feeling like your husband doesn’t care how you feel is another.

I used to think nothing was worse than being unhappy in your marriage.

Now, I think I know something much worse…

That’s being in a relationship with a man who ignores your feelings.

It’s much worse because it makes you feel like your feelings and emotions are not valid or significant enough to warrant attention.

It is a very lonely and frustrating experience to go through.

You are going through a rollercoaster of emotions because of a man who ignores your feelings.

I won’t lie to you and say that every married person has experienced this, but the fact is that you are not alone in this.

Perhaps with a better understanding of the reasons your husband ignores your feelings, things could get better.

This article explores what it means when your husband ignores your feelings and what you can do about it.

Come along; let’s get to the root of this matter!

What Does It Mean When Your Husband Ignores Your Feelings?–9 Reasons And What To Do About It 

1. He is stressed

When it comes to issues in relationships, even in healthy relationships, stress is a common factor influencing several of those issues.

Stress can transform a happy and energetic person into an irritable person who just keeps snapping at everyone.

The transformative power of stress is actually out of this world.

While many people have a high threshold for stress and can endure high levels of stress without being bogged down or transformed into aggressive people, some of us find it hard to deal with stress.

I have discovered that I am easily overwhelmed by stress, so I try my best to avoid unnecessary stress.

But there are times when you just can’t avoid it, and during those periods, I am usually at my lowest.

Usually, I am sensitive to people’s feelings, but during these periods, stress usually dulls my sensitivity and makes it look like I am ignoring the feelings of people around me.

Your husband may be someone like me who has a hard time coping with stress from work or other sources.

Because of this stress, your husband may not be sensitive to your feelings and emotions.

This may be the reason why your husband ignores your feelings.

One thing you need to note about this is that it doesn’t go on for a prolonged period.

It just happens occasionally, and during periods, he is stressed or fatigued.

2. He feels disrespected

There is something in the psychology of a man who desperately yearns for respect.

Don’t get me wrong, everyone wants to be respected.

But for men, it is a desperate need engrained in their psyche by years of social conditioning.

Husbands want to be respected by their wives in marriage, and when they don’t receive that respect, they may withdraw into their shells and ignore their wives.

I know you are about to say, “Respect is earned, not demanded”…

I agree with you that respect is earned, and some husbands have a way of demanding something they don’t deserve, like a child crying for a new toy after you just got him one.

However, thorough introspection would show if you have been disrespectful to your husband.

Are you overly critical of him?

Do you constantly compare him to his “mates” who care for their wives better?

Do you ever appreciate his efforts?

If the answer to the last question is negative, you have the answer for why it seems like your husband is ignoring your feelings.

You have nagged him so much that he has developed a thick skin for you and ignores you instead of getting worked up over anything you say.

If all you have done in the marriage is communicate your displeasure about him, it may be why he ignores your feelings.

He feels like he can never satisfy you, so he shouldn’t even bother trying.

3. He doesn’t know how to express his emotions

Society has created an image of masculinity that encourages men to be as stoic and lacking in emotional intelligence as those ancient Greek statues.

Right from a very young age, men are taught to keep their emotions bottled up “safely” within them.

I remember growing up and being told that “a man doesn’t cry”…

I took it as a personal creed to never cry.

However, my tear glands have betrayed me on occasions but only in private where no one can see me.

It is a struggle that men go through.

So, you may think your husband is ignoring your feelings while he is actually struggling to cope with something much worse that he can’t tell you about.

I know you are hurt that your husband seems to be ignoring your feelings.

Perhaps your husband doesn’t know how to communicate what he is feeling.

Your husband’s apparent disregard for your feelings may indicate a deeper emotional turmoil that he cannot express.

Knowing this doesn’t make it any easier for you, but it helps you understand where your husband is coming from.

4. He is upset over unresolved conflicts

If your husband is upset about something you may have done, he may ignore your feelings.

This is one of the dangers of unresolved conflicts.

When conflicts are not resolved correctly, they lead to more conflicts, leading to resentment.

When a man is feeling resentful, he may act like he doesn’t care about your feelings.

He may be ignoring your feelings because he feels you don’t care about his feelings, too.

This may be the beginning of a dangerous cycle in your relationship.

Remember that an unresolved conflict is like a wound that appears to be healed while it festers inside.

5. Intimacy has reduced drastically

Intimacy is necessary in every close relationship because it strengthens the bond of the relationship.

Marriage is the most intimate relationship because it is a union of two who become one.

Such fusion of different personalities requires intimacy of the highest form.

Intimacy is what helps your husband know when you are in a bad mood, even when you are trying your best not to show it.

When couples have intimate knowledge of each other, they are highly sensitive to changes in their partners.

One time, I went to study overnight in the library with friends.

A female friend of ours had a mood swing, and nobody else noticed except me.

She didn’t know I noticed until I asked her if she was fine.

Then she told me what happened.

The fact that others didn’t notice doesn’t make them bad friends; it just meant that they didn’t know her as well as I did.

If you notice that your husband is ignoring your feelings or just downright insensitive to them, you need to consider that your intimacy in the marriage has already taken a big hit.

6. You don’t communicate your feelings effectively

As a guy who has many female friends, I have noticed that females sometimes expect males to read their minds.

Relationships don’t work that way.

You can’t always expect your partner to know your feelings if you are not expressing them effectively.

Note that the keyword here is “effectively.”

If you feel displeased with something your husband has done, communicate that displeasure effectively.

Communicate it so that he would realize he has done something wrong and apologize.

Sometimes, the issue is not that you don’t communicate your displeasure.

The problem is that you communicate in such a combative way that he feels the best way to handle it is to ignore you.

He comes off feeling like a peace lover when he should be apologizing.

Communication is a key aspect of relationship that couples need to excel at if they want a successful relationship.

7. He is unhappy in the relationship

When your husband begins to ignore your feelings, it may be a result of unhappiness in the marriage.

There are so many reasons for a man to be unhappy in his marriage, foremost of which may be a lack of support from his wife, disrespect, nagging, financial challenges, and sexual dissatisfaction.

Whether it is for one of these reasons or a combination of more than one of them, your husband could be unhappy in the marriage and unsure of how to handle matters.

So, he chooses the easy route and just ignores you rather than tell you he is unhappy with you.

This is a very frustrating situation to deal with since you may not know what is making him unhappy and how to make him happy because he is silent about it.

However, there is still hope for your relationship.

If your husband is ignoring your feelings because he is unhappy with the marriage, you can find out what is making him unhappy and see how both of you can resolve the situation together.

8. He is no longer interested in the marriage

This is an option you need to consider if it seems like your husband perpetually ignores your feelings.

This is different from being unhappy in the marriage.

A man can be unhappy in the marriage and still be prepared to work with you to make things right.

However, when a man loses interest in the marriage, it shows that he is ready to end things.

He may not have said anything yet about ending the relationship, but he has it in mind, and all he is doing is biding his time until the time is “right” for him to do so.

Until then, he may continue intentionally ignoring you and your feelings.

9. He does not respect you

This is another great reason your husband ignores your feelings.

When you ask people what makes a relationship blossom, they are quick to mention love and trust.

However, mutual respect does as much as these two.

For two people to interact healthily in any relationship, there must be mutual respect.

It is even more necessary in marriages since there is that tendency to get overfamiliar with your spouse.

When your husband respects you, he cares about your feelings and seeks your opinion on matters involving the family and his personal life.

However, when he begins to ignore your feelings, it may be a sign that he no longer respects you enough to care about them or what you have to say.

He makes decisions for you and expects you to accept them.

Even when you don’t, he still goes ahead and does what he thinks is best.

10. He is cheating on you

I know I have mentioned some terrible reasons, but this is the worst-case scenario.

No one likes to be cheated on.

It is a betrayal that leaves a scar for years to come.

But we need to consider it at this point…

If your husband deliberately ignores your feelings over a long period, it is not just a sign that he is tired of the relationship; it may also be a sign that he has transferred his affection for you to someone else.

Your husband may be cheating on you, especially if he receives private calls all the time, guards his phone like it’s the national Treasury, and goes out at odd hours while ignoring your feelings.

Ultimately, ignoring your wife’s feelings is selfish and immature.

It is just as immature and diabolic as ghosting a lady because you feel like you are done with the relationship.

In the future, your relationship will depend on how sensitive you are to each other and how well you communicate.

Husbands should learn to communicate with their wives effectively, regardless of whatever social conditioning they may have received.

Now that you have the reasons, one question remains… What do you do about it?

Communication is the first place to start.

Tell your husband how his actions make you feel and genuinely inquire about his welfare.

If the issue is how you make him feel, you should work on improving those areas.

If he is struggling or depressed, it’ll be best for him to see a professional therapist.

You can also work on communicating your feelings more effectively if there has been a misunderstanding or lack of communication in the past.

Finally, marriage counseling works, and you can try it.

Ultimately, your husband must be ready to submit to the process, and you both must decide to work through the issues as a couple.

In the event that your husband is unwilling to change, you may need to make some tough decisions about your future.