When A Man Is Vulnerable With A Woman - 7 Things It Means - Olubunmi Mabel
Although men are meant to be natural risk takers, their affinity for risk usually doesn’t extend to being vulnerable with a woman or anybody.
Due to societal conditioning, men spend many years trying to run away from vulnerability.
For most men, vulnerability is a discomfort that they would rather not suffer because it is synonymous with weakness to them.
Ladies already know this, and even while they may pressure their men to be vulnerable with them, men cannot be pressured into doing it.
He has to want to do it (a very rare quality in men).
Hence, I can imagine your shock at seeing him getting vulnerable with you.
He tells you deep things about himself without you asking or asking for anything in return.
He is not sharing these deep things with you because he wants you to fix him.
Neither is he being vulnerable with you because he wants to excuse his bad behavior.
He does it naturally.
I know you are wondering why this is happening and what it means.
To help you understand better, I have curated a list of the things it means when a man gets vulnerable with a woman.
Come on, let’s find out which one relates to your unique situation!
When A Man Is Vulnerable With A Woman – 7 Things It Means
1. He is comfortable around you
Growing up, people used to have mixed perceptions of me.
People who just met me once usually said I was a gentle and quiet child.
Other people who have interacted with me more than once and pierced beyond my initial behavior know that it’s not true.
They usually say, “I and gentleness shouldn’t be put together in the same sentence.” Lol!
It still happens even now that I am a man.
Most of us don’t present our authentic selves when we meet people for the first time.
Don’t get it twisted; it’s not like we are pretending.
It’s more like we are still very tentative around the person because we are just meeting.
When a man gets vulnerable with a woman, it may just be a sign that he feels comfortable enough to be his genuine self around her.
At this point, he is no longer worried about trying to impress you with how he has his life in order.
He is comfortable enough to admit his fears at work or for the future.
He is comfortable enough to let you know he doesn’t have his whole life planned out ahead of him.
He can tell about how he is plagued with uncertainty because he is comfortable with you.
He knows you are not judgmental, and so he tells you deep things about himself.
When you see these signs of vulnerability in a man, it means that he is comfortable enough to be himself around you.
2. He may want to get closer to you
I once met a lady I liked, and soon after meeting her, I found out I was telling her deep things about myself.
I did that because I liked her and wanted to get close to her.
There is no better platform for emotional intimacy than vulnerability between two people.
It is important to understand that when a man becomes vulnerable with you, he is ready to express his fears, needs, secrets, and dreams to you.
It also means he is ready to build a stronger emotional bond with you.
If you would like a deeper emotional connection to him, you should reciprocate by being vulnerable.
You can foster healthy relationships with strong connections by sharing deep details about yourself.
3. He wants you to be his confidant
We all need that one person who would listen to us even when the whole world doesn’t.
We need that one person who would keep our secrets.
Secrets are meant to be secrets when you don’t tell anyone.
But most people have that one person they tell their secrets because they know the person won’t betray them.
When a man becomes vulnerable with you, it may mean he wants you to occupy that role in his life.
He has been around you for a long time and studied you.
He knows that you won’t be judgmental.
How does he know this?
Remember the first time he let his guard down?
He told you something personal; maybe it wasn’t so important, but it was personal.
You didn’t judge him, nor did he hear everyone discussing his secrets the next day.
That was the day you passed the first test.
That was the day he decided to let his down around you.
4. He wants to improve communication between you
Most times, first meetings can be really awkward.
Because you hardly know anything about each other, conversation may be difficult.
Except if there is some sort of divine spark.
However, this doesn’t happen a lot.
When you are guarded around someone, conversations with that person will always feel forced.
Hence, he may be letting his guard down because he realizes that your communication is poor and wants to improve it.
If you are observant, you will realize that he sounds like the most genuine version of himself when he speaks about his fears and anxieties.
You can literally see the sincerity oozing out of him.
And when you reciprocate it, it is like you have just removed the obstacle blocking the flow of your conversations.
There is an improvement in communication as both of you are now more honest while talking to each other.
If you are romantic partners, it becomes very useful for resolving conflicts in the future.
5. He respects you
When a man starts to get vulnerable with you, it is a sign of growing respect for you.
He respects you enough to want to hear your opinions about stuff happening in his life.
He respects you enough to confide in you and believes you won’t judge him or leak his secrets to others.
This reminds me of how I became a counselor by default because I was a leader in the church.
It wasn’t just because of my position that people felt they could tell me secrets; they knew I would respect the confidentiality of whatever was shared with me.
They knew I wouldn’t preach about it during Sunday service.
The fact that they made themselves vulnerable with me was a sign of respect and trust.
In the same way, when a man gets vulnerable with you, it is a sign that he respects and trusts you.
6. You have become an important part of his life
It is not easy for most men to be vulnerable with someone else.
Men thrive on being the picture-perfect image of a perfectly ordered existence.
Hence, when a man becomes vulnerable with a woman, he admits that he values her presence in his life.
He realizes that you have become an integral part of his life and if anything bad were to happen to him, he could always count on your support.
You don’t know how touching this knowledge can be to a man, especially one who has had to struggle through much of life on his own.
Even if he is one of those few men who find it easy to be vulnerable with people, it is still a sign that he values your presence in his life.
7. He loves you
Love is one of the major things that can make a man vulnerable with you.
If a man loves you, he will begin to see the need to express himself to you more and more.
He would want to ensure that you don’t just love the calm, put-together, and successful part of him.
He wants you to see his flaws and still love him.
So, he gets vulnerable with you because he wants you to love all of him.
How do you know this is the case?
He doesn’t just act vulnerable around you; he also makes romantic gestures like cooking for you, going on spontaneous dates with you, and sending you thoughtful gifts and good morning messages.
The fact is, when he combines his vulnerability with these romantic gestures, you can be almost sure that he loves you and wants something deeper with you.
However, you mustn’t assume.
Let a man tell you that he loves you and wants to be in a relationship with you before assuming that you are in a relationship.
This will help you avoid unnecessary heartbreaks.
Ultimately, to have a successful relationship, you must be vulnerable with each other.
Vulnerability is the true essence of romantic relationships, and to buttress this, I leave you with this quote…
