BOOK REVIEW: Colleen Hoover’s “It Ends With Us” - The DV Walking Wounded:
I know the movie of this book is in movie theatres right now, but I am THAT person that has to read the book before I see the movie. I was having dinner with some girlfriends recently and one of them told me I had to read the book. She left it on my desk last week and I must admit: I could not put it down. It got a bit intense, but I got through it. I would admit that it needs a TRIGGER WARNING if anyone reading it has been through domestic abuse before.
Colleen Hoover’s It Ends with Us is much more than the “romance” novel that it is categorized as. It’s a powerful and eye-opening story that shines a bright light on the tough topic of domestic violence, making it an incredibly important read. Let me rephrase: making it a MUST READ. The book introduces readers to Lily Bloom, a strong, determined woman whose life seems to be going well, despite her father’s death in the beginning. She’s started a business that she’s always wanted, and now in a relationship with Ryle Kincaid, a charming and gorgeous neurosurgeon. But beneath the surface of this seemingly perfect relationship, the author methodically explores the complex and often painful realities of abusive relationships.
What makes this book stand out is how deeply it connects the reader to Lily’s emotional journey. The portrayal of domestic violence in It Ends with Us is raw and honest. The author doesn’t shy away from showing the internal conflict Lily experiences—the push and pull between love, fear, and self-worth. It’s a story that shows how difficult it can be to recognize and break the cycle of abuse, even when you know it’s harmful. What I love most about this book is that it shows what victims go though, mentally and physically. It outlines how abusers incrementally step up the violence gradually, to the point where it makes the victim question their own reality. I adore that the book does not shame victims — instead, it shows how incredibly resilient we truly had to be to survive what came at us.
Through Lily’s story, it provides insight into how domestic violence often starts subtly and escalates over time. The book raises awareness of the difficult choices survivors face, and how society’s expectations can complicate leaving an abusive relationship. It’s a deeply emotional and thought-provoking read, but the author handles the subject matter with sensitivity and care. I also was impressed on how it illustrated the generational shift in abuse, as well as the “power and control” process that most people are not familiar with, if they’ve never been through abuse. The author also weaves in the subtlety of the trauma bond, between Lily and Ryle. It was masterfully done, to be completely honest.
One of the most impactful elements of the book is how it reminds us that abuse can happen to literally anyone, and it’s not always as black and white as it seems from the outside. It Ends with Us gives voice to the complexity of these situations and sheds light on how incredibly strong survivors are, even when they feel vulnerable. Those victimized are dehumanized by both their abuser and society. The abuser dehumanizes them through treating them as a possession, and society through victim blaming. I am impressed with how accurately a victim’s side is portrayed.
For anyone looking for a story that is both moving and important, It Ends with Us is a must-read. Not only does it keep you hooked from beginning to end, but it also opens up an important dialogue about domestic violence and the importance of breaking the cycle. Be ready to feel deeply, and maybe have some tissues on hand, because this book packs an emotional (and metaphorical) “punch,” which was probably a poor choice of words. Okay, to rephrase, it’s VERY impactful!
NOTE: There is a sequel to this book, It Begins WIth Us, that picks up where this book leaves off. I haven’t read it yet, but plan to and will review it here. I am also excited to see the movie, based on this book, but will probably wait until I can see it in the comfort of my own home, so I can shut it off, should it become too intense. I would advise other survivors to do the same, but please do what works for you! Love and light! <3
