She Walked Away
It was the beginning of spring. Now we’re in the middle of autumn; things wise and wonderful, unnerving and overwhelming, have been stitched into the fabric of my summer. As with all other seasons, lessons have been taught and learned; growth is present and painful and still a type of splendor that can only be seen if one chooses to be thankful.
What about you? Not a week went by all summer long when I wasn’t thinking of you. Driving home I would watch the sun sink behind the mountains or toss in turn in my bed or plunk away at my keyboard at work but still, I would wonder about you. I hoped that you wouldn’t leave after all this silence. I hoped that I would still have words to share that would speak hope into your hearts. Despite the wars and rumors of wars and unrest and sin that so easily entangles, I prayed that God would still be able to use this space for the souls who have chosen to stay.
Which is why I so fervently ask, once more, how are you?
I’ll give you a moment to process that, and feel free to leave a comment below. I would love to hear from you.
As for me, I wouldn’t say my life has been chaotic, but it has been full. I have days that go quickly but again, are bursting with events that it’s difficult to process the extent of what happens. In those days, I am talking, engaging, meeting, and interacting with people. And so the running theme of my life has been relationships: the significance of their existence, and the difficulty of keeping them.
People, of course, are complicated. Complexity runs through our system as naturally as emotions and DNA. It’s not a bad thing and I dare say it makes us interesting.
But for those of us who deal with people all day, every day—it can be entirely frustrating.
For the past couple of weeks, I was studying the book of Ruth and one of the commentators I was listening to made a distinction between Naomi’s daughters in law that I hadn’t thought about in all the times I’ve read through this book.
See, Naomi was an Israelite who, with her husband and two sons, moved to the pagan city of Moab when a famine occurred in her home country. In Moab, her sons married Moabite women: Ruth and Orpah. At some point along the way, Naomi’s husband and her two sons died, leaving Naomi, Ruth, and Orpah all widows. In a grieving state, Naomi decided to go back to Israel and prompted her daughters in law to return to their people and their gods (which is a small detail, but something about that never settled right with me, which we can probably get into another time).
After some time, Orpah decided to leave Naomi’s side; Ruth, however, clung to Naomi and said “don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God.” (Ruth 1:16)
While the focus is almost always usually on Ruth’s determination and willingness to not leave her mother-in-law…I want to focus on Orpah for just a moment.
Orpah left. This woman who had been a part of Naomi’s life and story and even family in a fraction of a moment became a woman who walked away, back to her old life, people, and gods. We know that Naomi told her to walk. Whether she was embarrassed to bring a Moabitess back with her, or if she didn’t want to hold her back, we don’t know, but we do know that Orpah did, indeed walk.
The point I’m trying to make from this story is, we can have people in our life who are there for just a little while. They can be our best friend, a co-worker, a daughter-in-law. We can share laughs and stories and cry tears with people we think will stand beside us forever, but in so many cases, that just isn’t so.
I may not be incredibly educated, but in the topic of lost relationships and people walking away, I may have a Ph.D. More times than I can count, souls have drifted into my life and drifted right out as quickly as they came. Especially the ones I thought were gonna stay forever. There were times I believed that the ties that bonded us were stronger than whatever tore us apart but unfortunately, the proof of our friendship was found in the messiness of life.
People walk away. I’ve had to walk away. Some relationships became too toxic to handle. With others, there was nothing that caused a wedge between us; it was just time to go.
Maybe one day, I could share more on that.
I wish I had more time to unpack this. But maybe it’s a way for you to do some digging on your own. In any way, I welcome you to ask questions and be curious about what happens intrinsically as you read through the Scriptures. Especially with things like this. All my life, I focused on the devoutness of Ruth, her willingness to give up her land, people, gods, everything she knew. And that is beautiful.
But there is so much in the details of Orpah. The role she played in Naomi’s story is similar to those lives who are part of our story for just a little while.
What means the most though, is while people walk away…Jesus does not. His consistency has carried me through what may have been the most heartbreaking seasons of my life. It helps to know that this life and all that is in it is temporary, but our Lord is not.
In this month of thankfulness, that is what I choose to remember. And for that, I am eternally grateful.