A Serious Message about Marriage - EncouragementMama.com

Today is my 27th wedding anniversary.

My husband and I got married in September of 1991, on a perfect fall day, with NO CLUE of what lay ahead.

But four kids and four grandkids later, we’ve learned a few things that have grown us closer than ever. And I’d like to share those with you today.

This is a serious message about marriage, and I pray the Lord will use it to work mightily in your life, as well as continue to work mightily in mine.

Dismiss “If-Onlys”

There is absolutely no room for should-haves, could-haves, or would-haves in your marriage. Regret doesn’t change a single thing.

It doesn’t matter if you think you married the wrong person at the wrong time or in the wrong way. As believers in Christ, we serve a Living God of redemption, restoration, and renewal.

If you have regretted past decisions in your marriage, I challenge you to dismiss them right now. In fact, I challenge you to take them to the Father and repent of them. Receive His forgiveness and seek restoration.

After all…

Doesn’t God make beauty from ashes? (Isaiah 61:3)

Does He not take what is broken and use it for His glory? (2 Corinthians 4:7-9)

Dismiss the “if-onlys” in your marriage today. You can have a bright and beautiful future together within the redemptive work of Jesus Christ.

Embrace a 2-Rule Marriage

It may sound simplistic, but my husband and I call our marriage the “2 Rule Marriage.”

Based on 2 Biblical principles, to us, they are fail-proof–as long as we actually put them into practice.

His Rule:

To love me just as Christ loves the church. (Ephesians 5:25)

Jesus loves the church (us) so much, He died for us. He was willing to take the sin of the world on his shoulders even though He was sinless.

This is sacrificial love that will go to great lengths to be lived out. However, it is also “tough love” at times, able to discern what is best.

My Rule:

To love and submit to him just as I love and submit to God. (Ephesians 5:22)

I don’t always want to submit to my husband, just as I don’t always want to submit to God. But when I do surrender my own plans, thoughts, and agenda, in accordance with God’s Word, my marriage is blessed.

Especially because I know that my husband has my best in mind, I can willingly submit, even if it’s not what I want. If you’re not sure what true submission means, look here and here. (starting at 1:25)

Serve Anyway

This point is going to be painful for some. I get it. There are times when the thought of serving our husbands makes us down-right angry. After all, we’ve got a lot on our plates, don’t we ladies?

Work, kids, schedules, house cleaning, errands, obligations, expectations…the list goes on.

But let me say this…

Serving your husband is not only amazingly fulfilling to him, but it can be wonderfully fulfilling for you.

There is something to be said for having a hot meal waiting for him after a long day at work.

There is something sweetly surprising about having his lunch packed and ready to go in the morning.

And there is something magical about filling his sock and underwear drawer with freshly laundered clothes. (if not magical, then practical ok? LOL)

Seriously, ladies, I have practiced these things for the last 27 years, not always with joy, but always with the knowledge that I am working as unto the Lord and not man. (Colossians 3:23)

And you know what?

No matter how tired, grumpy, frustrated or irritable I’ve been, I have NEVER regretted doing those basic things for my husband. In fact, the Lord has given my heart abundant peace in those mundane everyday things.

Why?

I believe it’s because I have tried to take on the example of Jesus, who took a basin of water and a towel and washed the feet of His disciples. His example, the humblest of examples, has inspired me to serve my husband in love and humility.

So, at the risk of thoroughly offending you and challenging you, I offer this serious message for your marriage. My husband and I don’t “have it all together.” We never have and we never will. But, we know the One who does; the God who holds everything together. (Colossians 1:17)

And by His grace, we will continue to be a living testimony of His mighty work for 27 more years or longer.

Always an email away,

Jennifer