Cheater-Speak: "I had unmet emotional needs in our marriage." - Divorce Minister
“You were all so busy with the kids. I felt neglected.”
“I never would have cheated if you had given me the attention he did!”
-Exodus 20:14, KJV
Your cheater may try to “justify” their sin to you.
Maybe they will point to you spending too much time raising the kids? Maybe they will talk about emotional distance while you were busy providing nice things for the family? Who knows what they will say?
It is all just noise.
The Bible is clear. No justification exists for cheating. God did not place an exception clause in His Ten Commandments.
Say that you actually were a terrible spouse. That STILL is not a good reason to commit adultery. It does not justify such sin.
I suspect you were not perfect but were far better than what your cheater says (see revisionist history).
Say you were focused on the kids. What stopped him from getting babysitters and taking you away to regular romantic weekends? Or what stopped him from pitching in and helping more as they are his kids, too? Was he cultivating his guy friendships or expecting you to meet all his emotional needs, which is unfair? You see he had other, better options than cheating.
Say you were too focused on work. What stopped her from bringing that up before cheating? Did she offer to reduce spending to claw back time? Did she offer to work more or get another job to reduce the financial pressures? Why couldn’t she find emotional support from good, gal friends? You see, she had other, better options than cheating.