How to Avoid a Hardened Heart

You might be surprised by the answer to this question: “How does a person get a hardened heart?” It can happen even when you’re listening to a preacher.

The hardening of a heart starts with a choice—how you receive a message. Some people listen with an open heart, ready to do what God says. Their hearts become softer and more pliable. Others listen to the same message and think, “I’ve heard that before. You’re not telling me anything new.” In that moment, their hearts begin to harden.

As I’ve often said, “The same sun that softens the wax hardens the clay.” The very truth that should soften a person’s heart can cause another person to become hardened and judged by the very message that should have set them free.

This is a powerful biblical principle, and we see it in the life of Pharaoh in the book of Exodus. Despite witnessing numerous miracles God performed through Moses, Pharaoh’s heart became increasingly hard.

In one of the first encounters, the Lord directed Moses to throw his shepherd’s staff on the ground in front of Pharaoh. It turned into a snake—a symbol of ancient Egypt. When Moses grabbed the snake by the tail, it turned back into a staff. I believe this was God’s way of telling Moses, “Face your fears. You will overcome Pharaoh and the might of Egypt.”
But Pharaoh was not impressed. And he hardened his heart.

The Choice is Yours: Free Will and a Hardened Heart

God has given each of us a free will, the ability to choose. He honors this privilege and will never force us to do His will. He said to the Israelites in Deuteronomy:
“Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live!” (Deuteronomy 30:19 NLT)

In other words, God gives us the choice and even tells us which one to make. To Pharaoh, God was saying, “Release the Israelites, or don’t.” And Pharaoh chose to harden his heart.

The Bible’s word for harden in this context can be translated as “strengthen” or “stiffen.” So, Pharaoh made his decision, and the Lord strengthened him in it. Pharaoh was responsible; he was culpable. We make our choices, and then our choices make us.

The Signs of a Hardened Heart in Believers

A hardened heart can happen to anyone, including Christians. Even Jesus’ own disciples had hearts that were hardened. When they ran out of food, before Jesus performed the miracle of multiplying the loaves and fish, he said to them:
“Why are you arguing about having no bread? Don’t you know or understand even yet? Are your hearts too hard to take it in?” (Mark 8:17 NLT)

If you’re a Christian today, how do you know if you have a hardened heart? Here are some key signs:

You’ve stopped caring. You no longer care about your own spiritual growth, the well-being of other Christians, or the lost people around you.
You resist worship. When others are engaged in worship, your arms are folded. You may even be judgmental or look down on their praise.
You are constantly critical. Some people think they have the spiritual gift of criticism, but it’s a sign of a hardened heart. They only see the bad and never the good.
You lack concern for the lost. You can’t remember the last time you invited someone to church. When someone becomes a Christian, you think, “Who cares?” and it doesn’t affect you at all.

God cares about lost people. And let’s remember that we were once lost people as well.

Choosing a Tender Heart Like Moses

We want to keep our hearts tender and open to God’s truth. The Bible warns us, “Be careful then, dear brothers and sisters. Make sure that your own hearts are not evil and unbelieving, turning you away from the living God” (Hebrews 3:12 NLT). Don’t harden your heart, because if you do, God will strengthen you in that decision.

In contrast to Pharaoh’s hard heart, Moses’ heart was full of faith and courage. The Bible tells us where he found that strength:
“It was by faith that Moses left the land of Egypt, not fearing the king’s anger. He kept right on going because he kept his eyes on the one who is invisible” (Hebrews 11:27 NLT).

Moses chose to keep his eyes on the Lord. That’s what kept him going—and that’s what will keep us going as well.

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