I Will Not Keep a List of Your Mistakes … and Here’s Why
I’d rather preach for thirty minutes than spend five minutes making announcements.* I’ve thought through a sermon, but announcements are often handed to me at the last moment. It’s in the off-the-cuff all-important announcements that I am prone to mispronounce words or butcher good grammar. I still must think twice before I utter “entrepreneur.” But at least, I never had Mike O’Brien keeping track of my verbal stumbles.
Before his retirement, Mike O’Brien worked for the Ford Motor Company. Since 2014, he kept a spreadsheet of several thousand verbal goofs uttered by his co-workers. He didn’t do it to be mean; he just thought it was funny, so he wrote it down.
Over time, O’Brien’s white board of gaffes took off. Others would give him examples they heard from others in meetings. Eventually, his office had six whiteboards covered with linguistic flubs.
- “We’re really low on money right now…we’re dancing on thin ice.”
- “We need to keep running in our swim lanes.”
- “I know these are swing-for-the-moon opportunities, but I think we should pursue them.”
- “We need to make sure dealers have some skin in the teeth.”
- “It’s no skin on our back.”
- “Too many cooks in the soup.”
- “Read between the tea leaves.”
- “I’m not trying to beat a dead horse to death.”
- “We need to talk about the elephant in the close.”
- “He’s going to be so happy he’ll be like a canary in a coal mine!”
Mike Murphy, a longtime marketing manager, held the distinction of having the most infractions written on the “Board of Words.” He said the potential of getting flagged added to the pressure of making presentations at a meeting. Murphy said. “All the sudden you’’ll hear a pen click, and you’re thinking, ‘What did I say that wasn’t right?’” At the same time, a “Board Word” could defuse a tense meeting. [Source]
I realize Mike O’Brien’s Board of Words was done with a spirit of levity, but I’d rather not make a public display of people’s mistakes. For some people, it’s a mild embarrassment, but others can feel humiliated. I’ve written in the past about why I will not make people the butt of a joke (see Why I Do Not Observe April Fool’s Day), and it serves no one to point out other’s missteps.
In recent weeks, I have been writing a study for Bible Studies for Life, which includes a look at 1 Corinthians 13. As I researched and wrote, I was struck by this one single description of agape love:
“[Love] does not keep a record of wrongs” (1 Cor. 13:5).
Peter said something similar:
“Above all, maintain constant love for one another, since love covers a multitude of sins” (1 Pet. 4:8).
That does not mean we can’t offer correction or constructive criticism. A single mistake is one thing, but if a person is regularly doing something wrong, we help them by correcting them. And if we’re talking about sinful behavior, we have a responsibility out of love for the individual to step in and say something.
“Brothers and sisters, if someone is overtaken in any wrongdoing, you who are spiritual, restore such a person with a gentle spirit” (Gal. 6:1).
When it comes to the words I utter—and the words others utter—my desire is to embody Paul’s command in Ephesians 4:29:
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
Let’s continue to laugh and enjoy life, but we don’t need to get a laugh out of someone else’s mistake. Let the words we speak bring joy and encouragement to everyone who hears them. Mike O’Brien, write that on your board!
*One day after writing this opening paragraph. my pastor asked me to make the announcements next Sunday. Sigh.
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