Not My Will: Finding Peace in Unanswered Prayer

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“And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.” – 1 John 5:14 (ESV)

As a child, my experience with prayers for healing involved traveling preachers who called the sick up to the front of the church for the laying on of hands, anointing oil, or a prayer cloth. Although I grew to understand that divine healing wasn’t a guaranteed outcome of these practices, I struggled with uncertainty and doubt when my own desperate prayers for physical healing were unanswered.

In 2012, a sudden panic attack spiraled into a grueling year of chronic, debilitating anxiety that crushed me both physically and emotionally. Even though I knew that God wouldn’t expect me to white-knuckle my way through this battle with my own strength, I felt responsible, as though my faith should have been “strong enough” to keep anxiety from spiraling into physical symptoms.

I prayed that my nervous system would align with the scriptural truths that would keep anxiety at bay. Driven by a fear that turning to medication meant my faith was too weak or that I was giving up on divine healing, I pleaded with the Lord for physical relief. Why wouldn’t it be in His will to “take it away” so I could be a walking testimony of His healing power?

Friend, if you’re struggling with a physical or mental setback that you think you should be “strong enough” to overcome, I understand your distress. Maybe you’ve also been told that if your faith was stronger and you didn’t “give up” on God, your prayers for healing might be answered.

Let me encourage you with this truth: God hears—and answers—your prayers (Psalm 18:6, Psalm 34:17, Psalm 66:19). Scripture does instruct us to pray for healing (James 5:14), and even Jesus pleaded with the Father to “remove this cup” when He faced death on the cross (Luke 22:42).

However, God’s answer to our prayers may not be the one we are specifically praying for. Just as Jesus concluded His prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane with “not my will, but yours, be done,” we’re also taught to pray “according to His will.”

Even though Jesus’ ministry was full of miraculous healings, Scripture makes it clear that physical healing isn’t always a part of God’s plans. When God’s response isn’t to remove your source of suffering, as the Apostle Paul described in 2 Corinthians 12:8-10, you can still trust in His goodness and plan to work through your hardships to fulfill His purposes (Romans 8:28).

Such complete surrender may not happen overnight. I struggled to let go of my expectations for God’s response to my prayers for many months. However, you can be assured that God is with you in the wrestling. He’s hearing your prayers, and He promises His peace, presence, and strength (Philippians 4:6-7) to guard your heart and mind as He works all things for your good and His glory.

Questions for Reflection:

1. Have unanswered prayers for healing or relief from suffering caused you to question the strength of your faith?

2. How does Jesus’ prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane affect the way you view your unanswered prayers?

3. What expectations or specific outcomes are you currently struggling to surrender to God?