Stride Confidently toward Humility
“Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for ‘God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.’” – 1 Peter 5:5 (RSV)
Anyone who meets me sees confidence in my posture, my stride, my readiness to join almost any conversation. Projecting confidence is how you get picked to do things, and I like to be picked. A confident air encourages people to trust your judgment, and I’m almost always confident my judgment should be trusted.
But am I displaying confidence or arrogance? And at what point does my accurate judgment of my many strengths slide into an inappropriate and ungodly pride?
Humility is the opposite of pride, but we don’t always know how to distinguish between them. We generally know we’re seeing pride when a person is always telling us how great they are or ignores other people and just barrels through—whether in a conversation or in a group activity. On the other hand, when a person is always putting themselves down, we also often realize we’re not seeing humility. Maybe they’re pretending to be modest so others will compliment them. Perhaps they aren’t pretending, but don’t properly value the person God has made them to be.
Humility is one of those virtues that lives in the middle way. It recognizes in each of our true identities—the gifts and talents that have come from God, and the flaws in our humanness that have yet to be overcome. It neither overestimates nor underestimates our abilities. It neither climbs to high places God hasn’t assigned nor remains in a place lower than God intends. When we live humbly, it pleases God. God rewards those who live humbly. He even holds back His anger when the person who deserves God’s punishment humbles him or herself.
Humility is one of those virtues that isn’t a fruit of the Spirit. It’s up to you and me to learn. University psychologist Everett Worthington, perhaps best known for training people in forgiveness, also developed a free workbook called The Path to Humility that has been (believe it or not!) scientifically demonstrated to help people live more humbly.
Humility doesn’t come naturally to most people. But most people can learn humility. Even … maybe … me.
Questions for Reflection:
1. Here are a few questions based on Worthington’s work to help you grow in humility:
2. What makes you aware that God and God’s world are bigger than you? A walk in nature? A child’s giggle? When do you find yourself experiencing awe?
3. Are there times when you share your talents and resources without expecting to be honored for it? What makes you willing at those times to share God’s generous gifts without being recognized for it? Are there other times when you are less willing? Do you know what makes these different for you?
4. When have you allowed relationships to humble you? Have you had the humbling experience of admitting you’re wrong—maybe acknowledging that your opinion was ill-founded or that you’d treated someone badly? How did this humbling affect you? How did it affect those relationships?
