Finding Life in a World of Lament
My world is filled with lament. Personal loss has led me to be a resource for others in their loss. Lately, grief is layered. My middle son turns 18 next month, and my firstborn died at 18. Yet, amid my stirred-up grief, my choice to grieve with hope has opened the doors to comfort those in dark circumstances. I’ve been in hospitals, schools, and counseling in the past month.
I would not trade these opportunities to bless others for anything. I have wept with and cried out to God for their needs. Yet I found myself drained leading into Christmas. I was starting to focus more on the suffering around me rather than the “God of all comfort.” (2 Corinthians 1:3, NIV) How do I maintain my health as I wade through heavy things this year? I recognized that I needed to cry out to God and remind myself of His character. Spending time meditating on Psalm 44 challenged me to shore up my lament.
The author is raw with his questions. God, where are you? I can feel the guttural cry of his lament. There is a reason that so many in this world can quote Psalm 23, “The Lord is my shepherd”… The psalmists were often chased, persecuted, experienced sleepless nights, and felt stripped of resources. When I struggled to function, to process anything in my brain after my son’s death, the Psalms helped me to weep and cry out to a God who wasn’t distant from my pain, even when He didn’t explain his ways.
Beyond the Psalms, people like Joseph, Daniel, and Job, as well as the writers of the New Testament, all cried out to God. I want to lament well because the result is always knowing God’s character better, trusting his ways above my own, and having an honest relationship with Jesus and those around me. I can share hope with you because I choose to be honest with my questions to God. Relief, refreshment, and hope are in the honest cries of lament. What does lament look like?
- Confessing honest emotions
- Acknowledging what I know of the character of God
- Acknowledging the enemy’s attack
- Sometimes, a turn of attitude
- Personal pronouns
- Intimacy
- Song
- Acknowledging God’s provision
- Praise
- Confession
- Repentance
Job is an interesting example as he never directly addressed his lament to God. He defended God to his friends and confessed all he understood of God’s character. His suffering felt contrary to what he understood. Yet, when he and God had their exchange, God still didn’t explain to Job why he suffered. Instead, God declared His authority over the earth and authority over our lives. Job acknowledges his wrong thinking and praises God for who he is. Job states that he not only knows God by his ears, but now he knows God by sight. (Job 42)
The result of lamenting well is that one day, I’ll not only know God by what I’ve heard, I will know him by sight. That is worth lamenting for.
Question for Reflection:
This question is actually a challenge. This New Year, study the Psalms and study Old Testament and New Testament people who modeled lamenting well.
Suggested Reading: Dark Clouds, Deep Mercies: Discovering the Grace of Lament by Mark Vroegop