The Discerning Life: An Invitation to Notice God in Everything
Steve Macchia on discernment: “We want a simple system to follow: set up the room, put people in place, consider the right options, add a prayer, and then press the button of discernment.”
“God, what fabric softener do you want me to buy at the store this week?”
Wait! Is this a book on discernment—or an entire PBS season of This Old House? With delightful humor and humility, Steve Macchia’s troubles and travails with his 75-year-old house create the stage for learning and listening—and noticing God’s heart for us.
Don’t skip Steve’s true stories (and memorable old house metaphors). “Apparently, tomato sauce can expire, and when it does, it explodes.” The porch of heaven (beautiful). Low water pressure issues. Ice dams on the roof from a long winter (dubbed “snowmageddon” and “snowpocalypse”). It gets worse, of course! (The poor guy!)
But, really, this is a hopeful book. The Discerning Life: An Invitation to Notice God in Everything emits the same respectful tone that oozes out of Macchia’s other books (see Crafting a Rule of Life and others). Steve writes with high regard and aspirations for readers and leaders—fellow pilgrims. He confesses, “The older I get, the harder it is to pray.” Steve admits he’s “just a beginner” in this discernment journey, and so with that honest humility, he invites me in. I love this book.
TAP. TAP. TAP. I’ll never forget the moment when Steve Macchia, speaking to several hundred ministry leaders, asked us to “Tap, Tap, Tap” on a colleague’s shoulder. We faithfully followed his directions, chuckled, and then stopped. And then this classic response from Steve: “Wait! I didn’t tell you to stop tapping!” (More chuckles.) And with that, Steve gifted us with a lifelong metaphor of God as a loving initiator.
BONUS! Listen to The Discerning Leader Podcast for Steve Macchia’s interview with John Pearson (Episode 4, April 21, 2022).
Macchia asks, “But are we aware of his presence? He’s tapping on the shoulder of our hearts all the time: tap, tap, tap . . . tap, tap, tap. As Christ- followers, it’s incumbent upon us to notice the tap and not brush it aside, shun God’s presence, or be so numbed or hardened or oblivious as to miss it altogether.” This book rekindled that moment. I’m so grateful.
“FAR TOO OFTEN, SPIRITUAL DISCERNMENT HAS BEEN PIGEON-HOLED,” Steve writes, “into the exclusive realm of decision-making, learning how to make good choices and know God’s will methodically and predictably. We want a simple system to follow: set up the room, put people in place, consider the right options, add a prayer, and then press the button of discernment.”
He adds, “For some people, spiritual discernment is reserved for major ministry or organizational decisions, like calling the right pastor or determining where to plant a church. For others, it’s a tool used to spiritualize every single decision: God, what fabric softener do you want me to buy at the store this week?”
Why a book on discernment? “There is no more important topic for the church to wrestle with today than to know God, notice him at work in, through, and all around us, and to aid others in embracing and fulfilling the discerning life.”
With several helpful definitions and commentaries on “discernment,” I especially appreciated this one: “Perceiving and noticing the present, attentive to the now, and in anticipation of the next—like holding hands and looking both ways before safely crossing the street.”
Tall order? Yes! “All of this will take a lifetime to rehearse,” promises Macchia.
LOL! “On a spiritual retreat a handful of years ago, I was sitting with a spiritual mentor, detoxing my hurting soul. I was sharing about feelings of abandonment from those I thought had my best interests in mind but had turned against me. I was not in a good place. After listening to my story, this godly man encouraged me to do one of the strangest things ever suggested to me:
“Wink at myself in the mirror. At least once a day. For the foreseeable future. That sounded so bizarre! But his point was to do this as a reminder of God’s unconditional love for me each day. This spiritual leader shared that our lives will be filled with disappointment, heartache, suffering, and sorrow. That reality we cannot change. But the inner reservoir of our soul can indeed be opened to receive love once more, over and over and over again. That’s the way of God, and if we’re to live a discerning life, it’s to become our way too.”
ALLERGIC TO SPIRITUAL DEPTH. Macchia is just warming up when he reminds us that “Without a prayer closet, we are destined to live an inch deep and a mile wide. For any number of reasons, we are highly allergic to spiritual depth. We’re guilty of a self-ordained, self-empowered, self-absorbed life. And although we value the priority of prayer and believe in the importance of a prayer closet, we are far too busy for such a notion to be fully realized in our lives. It reeks of weakness. It smacks of ritual. It sounds boring. I used to need it, but it’s no longer necessary. Been there, done that, moving on.
“DEPTH IS SUBTRACTIVE. IT IS NOT ADDITIVE. We don’t dig a hole high; we dig it deep,” writes Macchia. “Similarly, in the spiritual life, depth relates to what’s going on underneath the surface. A deeper life isn’t measured by accumulation, unless what’s gained is more of God. Depth is hidden and mysterious. Depth is experienced most abundantly in relation to what we lose or sacrifice or release. Even depth of knowledge, depth of compassion, depth of character, depth of insight, and depth of contentment require some form of letting go in order to fully receive.”
Macchia continues, “Preconceived notions need to be released in order for greater knowledge to be received. Creature comforts need to be released in order for compassion to be offered. Humility creates character. Wisdom forms insight. Contentment comes from letting go of that which previously defined you. In spiritual depth, we find life at its fullest by letting go. In so many profound ways, the spiritual life is all about letting go—not always complete detachment (as in the love of our spouse or child), but by holding people and things with a much looser grip, in order to mature as God desires.”
In recent years, I’ve slowly munched on one book for up to six months (just on weekends)—seeking to go slow and deep. Examples: Packer’s Knowing God and Blackaby’s Experiencing God. But…the deep end of the pool can be threatening. Nevertheless, The Discerning Life is my weekend book for the next six months.
To order from Amazon, click on the title for The Discerning Life: An Invitation to Notice God in Everything, by Stephen Macchia. Listen to the book on Libro.fm (8 hours, 7 minutes).
YOUR WEEKLY STAFF MEETING QUESTIONS:
1) Here’s an idea—go deep on this book with your team members. The stories are page-turners (think This Old House—the perfect discernment metaphor). The “Practicing a Preference for God” succinct summaries (see “Tap, Tap, Tap”) are so helpful. And the lists…oh, my…the lists! Steve Macchia resists formulaic pious claptrap—and instead—delivers deep and soul-challenging content: discernment definitions (5), discernment postures (12), soul-neglect causes (10), stumbling blocks to listening (10), poignant discernment questions (11), Jesus’ favorite topics (17)—you’ll love the lists! And this reminder: “All of this will take a lifetime to rehearse.” OK team—who will summarize the first chapter at our next staff meeting?
2) Steve Macchia writes, “A consistent visit to your prayer closet fulfills your soul’s deepest longings. A prayer closet can be as simple as a dedicated time and space where you go with Bible, journal, and pen in hand to meet with God, as unhurried, unhindered, and uncluttered as possible. That’s all that’s needed—nothing more; nothing less.” Is “closet” a metaphor here—or does Steve Macchia expect us to actually find a closet for prayer times?
Communicate your annual S.M.A.R.T. Goals for volunteers using the one-page G.N.O.M.E. Chart. Read the Volunteer Bucket chapter in Mastering the Management Buckets.
The 20 Buckets Countdown:
The Volunteer Bucket (#12) Insights from Mastering the Management Buckets Workbook: Management Tools, Templates and Tips from John Pearson, with commentary by Jason Pearson (2nd Edition, 2018) – Order from Amazon.
The Volunteer Bucket Core Competency: “We reject the notion of a two-tiered Kingdom workforce. Instead, we seek to treat our paid volunteers (staff) and our unpaid volunteers with equal passion and intentionality. We will never have enough paid staff to accomplish our Kingdom assignments, so we continually hone our skills in volunteer cultivation, recruitment, orientation and engagement.”
Tap! Tap! Tap!—Discernment for Volunteers (i.e. Board Members). Steve Macchia’s “Tap, Tap, Tap” theme is featured in two books by Dan Busby and John Pearson. Read Macchia’s blog commentary on Lessons From the Nonprofit Boardroom (Lesson 11), and read Peter F. Clements’ blog commentary on Lessons From the Church Boardroom (Lesson 11). And click here for the five-minute video conversation with Busby and Pearson, “Tap! Tap! Tap!”
Enhance Volunteer Satisfaction and Mission Results! Visit the Volunteer Bucket webpage and download Worksheet #12.1, “The G.N.O.M.E Chart: Annual Volunteer Goals.” In just one page, you and your volunteer team can establish Annual S.M.A.R.T. Goals for your volunteers in four key areas: Cultivation, Recruitment, Orientation, and Engagement. Click here.
The 20 management buckets are perfect content for the lifelong learning segment in your weekly staff meetings (you do have weekly staff meetings, right?). Visit the 20 buckets webpage here.
Check out John’s new blog, Pails in Comparison (PIC), with with additional book reviews including this fascinating read:
• PIC #5: Inside Marine One: Four U.S. Presidents, One Proud Marine, and the World’s Most Amazing Helicopter, by Col. Ray L’Heureux and Lee Kelley – (read review)
JASON PEARSON: UNEXPECTED CREATIVE. Need help discerning next steps in your communication strategies? Is prayer and discernment an integral part of your team’s process? It can be! Contact Pearpod Media (Design, Digital, Marketing, Social).
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