Kinds of betrayal that can ruin your marriage

Cheating is not the only kind of betrayal that could ruin your marriage. Some things we do could unconsciously destroy our relationship with our spouse. 

Betrayal of trust could take many forms. While some are clearer than others, such as having an affair, all could affect a relationship's trust and emotional security.

Thus, we should be aware of those betrayals to protect our marriage. 

Kinds of betrayal 

Marriage is a school of never-ending learning. There is no healthy marriage that could last for long without experiencing a lot of struggles and endurance. 

Moreover, the more we learn to care for and protect our relationship with our spouse, the stronger and happier our marriage will become.

So here are some kinds of betrayals we must avoid to ruin our marriage.

Not making your spouse a priority

Once you get married, your next priority after God is your spouse, not your career, personal needs, social media, or parents. When we do not prioritize our spouse over these matters, we unconsciously betray them.

If this act became a habit, it could slowly ruin your marriage. A spouse who feels unappreciated and insignificant could damage them emotionally by making them resent their partner.

For instance, you are not bothered by resolving fights with your spouse if you spend too much time on your phone, even if you are in the same room. 

Imagine how much time you spend watching videos online and how much you spend time talking to your partner.

Besides, evaluate your time in the office and your time at home. You may have spent more time talking to your colleagues than with your spouse.

You may not realize that these actions show that your husband or wife is not your priority. 

Keeping secrets

Another kind of betrayal is keeping secrets from your spouse. Worrying about how our spouse will react if we tell them about the problem or our weaknesses is natural. 

As they say, it is better to hurt them by telling the truth than by keeping it a secret.

More so when we choose to hide our addictions, such as drugs, online shopping, or pornography, and then they find out. 

It would lead them to question their worth and what else you could hide from them.

Additionally, once your secrets have been revealed, they could question why it is not good enough for you not to tell them what is happening.

There is nothing good about keeping secrets from your spouse. It is a form of cheating. Eventually, it would come out, and you would face more problems.

Putting down your spouse 

We may think that saying offensive words to our spouse in private or public is normal, especially if you have been married for a long time. However, it is another kind of betrayal. 

Love is never offensive. When we humiliate our spouse in front of others or reveal their weaknesses to our friends or family, we betray them by showing that their shortcomings make them not trust us. 

Furthermore, name-calling, bullying, putting them down, or outbursts of anger could emotionally damage your partner. 

We may think it fun, but our words and actions could negatively impact you in the long run and could ruin your spouse’s self-esteem.

Not supporting your spouse

Supporting your spouse is one of the most essential ways to maintain a happy and healthy marriage. 

Your opinion matters the most more than anyone else, and if you do not support your spouse, you are unconsciously betraying them.

Our partners could be very effective in their careers or field if they know we support them. 

Yet, they would constantly be distracted and anxious about how we feel if they knew we were not happy with what they were doing. 

Like what they say, behind a man's success is a supporting wife, and vice versa. 

Lying

You may think lying to your spouse about “unimportant things” is okay. However, lying about unimportant things could significantly impact your marriage. 

Also, regardless of whether it is white lies, all forms of lying are wrong. 

It could damage trust, another crucial ingredient of a healthy marriage. If your partner cannot trust you with small things, how can they trust you with great things?

Emotional cheating

Have you ever talked to or messaged someone, and you felt worried that your spouse would find out about the conversation? It is emotional cheating. 

Emotional cheating includes a connection with someone who becomes more intimate, unique, or sexually flirtatious. 

Also, if you stay up late to contact this person and become secretive with your phone, you betray your partner. 

Although some may say there is no physical involvement, it is harmless. This behavior is an act of having an affair. 

It could not only destroy your relationship but could ruin your family.

Telling problems to others first

Telling your problems to others first before opening them up to your spouse is another form of betrayal. Marriage is where you can openly communicate with your spouse about anything. 

Nevertheless, we show that we do not trust our spouse when we tell our issues to others before them. 

They would feel betrayed since they think you are partners and are supposed to win and lose together. 

More so, they would be surprised and disappointed to know that almost everyone around you knows what is wrong except them, your spouse.

Emotionally unavailable

Have you ever asked your spouse how they are doing or if they are still okay? 

Not being there, especially in times of need, is a betrayal.

Evaluate yourself to see if you were there when your spouse needed your comfort. When we married our partner, we did not just marry all their good sides but also the bad.

We are the first to be by their side when they feel down. Yet, not being absent in those moments betrays them for not fulfilling our promises when we said “I do.” 

Marriage is about being there for “better or worse,” not just for the better. 

Most wives felt alone, especially after giving birth, because their husbands may not be sensitive enough to help them. 

They are facing many physical, mental, and emotional changes, so their husbands should be beside them.

The same is true for husbands; some may feel alone in their roles as providers and think their wives would not understand their situations. Thus, wives should be willing to listen first before speaking.

Be aware and protect your marriage

Not all these forms of betrayal are apparent. Sometimes we might be doing it thinking it would not affect our marriage, but when we try to analyze it, simple habits could grow and become our character. 

One white lie may not affect your relationship, but consistent lying could make you unfaithful. We must be aware of these types of betrayals to prevent our marriage from failing. 

Remember that being married is one of the most precious gifts God has given to humanity. So, we should do everything to protect it from the enemy's schemes, even if it requires us to change our behavior.

God gives us wisdom on caring for our relationship with our spouse. We will enjoy our relationship with our spouse when we are careful and faithful to obey God’s will and commands.