We Know How to Love
“We love each other because He loved us first.” – 1 John 4:19 (NLT)
Before I met my husband, I often wondered what the love of Jesus would look like in a companion. Growing up in a broken home, I was confused about what it meant to love God. I’d heard familiar phrases like “God is love” (1 John 4:8) and “God, in love, died for us” (Romans 5:8), but I struggled to comprehend them. I loved Jesus, but I didn’t know what that love would look like from a human. Maybe you can relate?
As humans, we’re incapable of fully embodying the love of God. We’re imperfect, fallen, and sinful beings. We can only receive His love and extend it to others through His grace and mercy. Yet, even the love we give often falls short of the Almighty’s eternal, never-ending, everlasting love.
The day I met Ben, everything changed. I saw the love of God not only within Him but also overflowing from His soul. It was the same love I had witnessed in my mom caring for me, my grandma caring for my grandpa, and volunteers helping those in need on the streets.
All my life, I struggled to know what it meant to love God. I wrestled with how eros love in marriage related to agape or philia love in friendship. I felt the pain of familial love that sometimes wasn’t as it should be, and I grappled with betrayal from those I trusted. But God used Ben to demonstrate His love for me, teaching me this truth: Even if we haven’t always been loved as we should’ve been, we still know how to love. How?
1 John 3:16 tells us, “This is how we know what real love is: Jesus gave his life for us. So we should give our lives for each other as brothers and sisters” (ERV). We’re capable of sharing agape, philia, and even storge love because, despite any lack we may have experienced on earth, God is our Heavenly Father, our Best Friend, our Comfort in the Storm, and our Unconditional Source of Love that will never leave our side.
Question for Reflection:
- Do you find yourself struggling to love God, or to understand what it means to love Him?
- Do you wrestle with scars from those who should have loved you well but didn’t?
- Try this practice: When you look in the mirror in the morning, inhale deeply for four seconds. As you do this, mentally recite the words, “We love.” Hold your breath for four seconds, then exhale for eight seconds through your mouth, reciting, “Because He first loved us.” This daily practice can help start your day by reminding you of God’s love. Feel free to interchange it with any verses that resonate with you.