Humility Was Never Meant to Break You
In our walk of faith, we are taught to cherish "humility" and "submission." Lowering oneself and valuing others above ourselves is undoubtedly a beautiful virtue. However, I have come to realize that these holy values can sometimes be weaponized to erode one’s soul within a dysfunctional relationship.
Many mistakenly believe that enduring someone’s disrespect or irresponsibility in silence is the ultimate form of humility. However, true humility is about grounding oneself in the Truth, not surrendering one's dignity to another’s arbitrary control. If someone uses your willingness to lower yourself as a stepping stone to exercise dominance, that is not spiritual order—it is a mutation of pride.
When someone says "I'm doing this for your own good" or "think about what others will think of you", it might sound like they really care. But often, these words are just a way to control you, to make you feel bad about yourself so you do what they want. Real love isn't about using someone's weaknesses against them, it's about being kind and understanding, filling in the gaps where they struggle. If someone seems really devoted in public, but doesn't actually care in private, we need to take a closer look at what's really going on, at the real results of their actions, not just what they say.
The burning sensation of injustice and the rising tide of resentment in the face of mistreatment are not signs of weakness. They are the honest cries of a soul declaring, "This is not the Truth.” Confronting the reality of malice is agonizing, but only by passing through this pain can we break free from a "false peace" and find authentic liberation.
God does not desire for us to live withered lives, constantly walking on eggshells. Our gifts and abilities are not meant to shrink ourselves for the approval of others, but to glorify God and live the life we were created for. True humility is about standing confidently in the identity God has given us. It's time to walk in the fullness of who God created us to be.
