Partners for life: How should husbands love their wives

In today's society, the sacredness of marriage often seems to be overlooked or even disregarded by many. 

As a Christian, it is essential to remember and faithfully follow God's commandments regarding the holy sacrament of marriage.

The sacrament involves two individuals become one flesh, bound by love, respect, and unwavering commitment.

As a husband, one of the most profound ways you can honor this divine covenant is by loving your wife as exemplified in Ephesians 5:25-28. 

The biblical passage serves as a guiding light because it reveals the selfless and sacrificial love husbands are to show toward their wives.

In this article, we will explore the depths of this divine commandment. 

Moreover, it can serve as a helping hand for husbands to have a comprehensive understanding of how you should love your wife.

Breaking down the meaning of Ephesians 5:25-28

Marriage, from a biblical perspective, is not simply a legal contract or a social arrangement. It is a sacred union that is established and joined together by God the moment you commit to each other in His presence. 

In the culture that the Apostle Paul was addressing, men held significant authority over women, children, and slaves. In turn, this posed a challenge to fulfilling the sacred union.

However, Paul proclaimed that women, slaves, and children were equally valued and loved by God. 

Through Christ's sacrifice, they could experience reconciliation with God. Moreover, they could receive the indwelling of the Holy Spirit and become part of the Body of Christ.

Concerning this, Paul directed husbands to love their wives saying,

“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, that he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.”

Sacrificial love

For husbands to love their wives, Paul directs them to look at the ultimate symbol of love - the cross. 

Just as Christ sacrificially gave Himself up for the Church, husbands are called to emulate this selfless love in their marriages. 

Sacrificing for one's wife does not come naturally. This challenges men to examine their willingness to give up something dear for the sake of their spouse.

Remember that Christ's sacrificial act was intentional and purposeful. As a result, husbands are likewise urged to love their wives with intention and purpose, seeking to help their wives reach their fullest potential as God intended. 

The goal is to be an agent of love and support, leading their wives to a point of fullness and completion in Christ.

Oneness

The verse also states that husbands have the responsibility to love their wives as they love themselves. 

Besides, the bond between husband and wife is inseparable. By loving his wife as himself, a husband demonstrates a profound understanding of the oneness that exists within their union. 

Their love should not be selfish. Rather, it is a reflection of the biblical command to love one's neighbor as oneself.

Practical ways husbands love their wife

As a reflection of Christ's sacrificial love for His Church, your role as a husband calls for intentional and practical expressions of love. 

Here are some ways you can follow.

Value her femininity

As you walk alongside your wife in this sacred journey of marriage, recognize and treasure her femininity. 

Embrace the beautiful differences that make her a woman and celebrate the unique qualities she brings to your relationship. 

Show respect for her thoughts, emotions, and perspectives. Moreover, value her contributions as an equal partner in your marriage. 

Also, affirm her worth as a beloved daughter of God and let your actions show your genuine appreciation for her role as a woman in your life.

For instance, you can plan a special date night centered around her interests, such as visiting a museum or attending a dance class she's always wanted to try. 

You can also encourage her to pursue her passions and hobbies, providing support and encouragement as she explores her unique talents. 

Another, you can compliment her on her strengths as a woman, acknowledging her nurturing nature, compassion, and wisdom.

Protect her

As her husband, you are to be her protector and guardian. 

In this case, cultivate a safe and nurturing environment where she feels cherished and cared for, both emotionally and physically. 

Stand firmly by her side through life's challenges, offering a reassuring presence in times of difficulty. 

Let her know that you are her rock, and she can rely on your unwavering support.

For example, you can accompany her when she feels uneasy or vulnerable, such as walking her to her car at night or being her advocate in challenging situations. 

Do not mistreat her

In your role as a husband, choose to treat your wife with kindness and respect at all times. 

Embrace the responsibility of loving her unconditionally, avoiding any form of verbal, emotional, or physical abuse. 

Be mindful of your words and actions, ensuring they build her up rather than tear her down.

For example, when disagreements arise, communicate with patience and empathy. Moreover, seek understanding and common ground. 

Strive to create a home filled with love, harmony, and emotional safety, where both of you can flourish and grow.

As Ephesians 4:29 reminds us, 

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."

Out-serve her

Exemplify servant leadership in your marriage by seeking to out-serve your wife with selflessness and humility. 

Make a deliberate effort to prioritize her needs above your own, recognizing that true love is expressed through sacrificial acts of service.

For example, you can take the initiative to help with household chores or responsibilities without waiting for her to ask for assistance. 

Show her that you care deeply by anticipating her needs and demonstrating your commitment to making her life more comfortable and joyful.

Remember Galatians 5:13b, 

"Serve one another humbly in love."

Stay loyal to her

Fidelity is the bedrock of a strong and committed marriage. Promise your unwavering loyalty and devotion to your wife, nurturing a bond of trust and intimacy that can withstand the tests of time.

To do so, continuously express your love and commitment to her, both through your words and actions. 

Moreover, avoid any situation that could compromise the trust you have built, and consistently prioritize your marriage above all other relationships.

As Hebrews 13:4 says, 

"Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral."

Love that nourishes 

In the sacred bond of marriage, love is the foundation on which your union thrives. 

Just as Christ's love for the church is selfless and sacrificial, so should the love between you and your spouse. 

Remember that as you love and care for your wife, you are also nurturing your own heart and soul. 

The love you pour into your marriage will be returned to you in abundance, creating a circle of love that sustains and nourishes both of you.

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