Embrace the Love of God

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O God, you are my God . . . my soul thirsts for you . . . as in a dry and weary land where there is no water. – Psalm 63:1 (ESV)

I call 2011 the Year of Loss. One by one, my responsibilities shifted and ceased over the year, creating a season when activities came crashing down. My sons left: One got married; the other went to college. These were wonderful events, but it felt like too much at once. I also lost ministry: Worship leading ended after 12 years; missions stopped after nine years; even serious theater involvement dwindled. Some loss from that year is still so painful and private that I can only verbalize it to the Lord. On top of this, I almost lost my faith. Where was God? Did He care? I wrestled with God, trying to maintain my faith in Him, but I struggled to see His good hand.

Unbeknownst to me, God was transforming my relationship with Him. In January of 2011, I decided to read the Psalms throughout the year for my quiet time. For days, I would pore over one psalm, lingering on each phrase, imbibing deeply from the well of love and pathos that the psalmists shared in their writings. I poured out to Him my uncertainties. I knew He was big enough to handle my doubt, but I still struggled to believe that He was there and loved me. I felt what the psalmists felt: attacked by some unknown enemy and yearning for a clear word from the Lord about the hard things. But God met me right where I was, in the midst of an emotional and spiritual pain that was too big to handle by myself.

The psalms of lament spoke to me the most: “How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever?” (Psalm 13:1). “Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage” (Psalm 27:14). “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18). “The Lord of hosts is with us.” (Psalm 46:11).

But somewhere in the middle of the year, around Psalm 18, I discovered that God loved me deeper than I could ever imagine. Psalm 18:19 says, “He rescued me, because he delighted in me.” Delighted? Yes, delighted. God delights in me, enjoys, gains pleasure from, feels gladness with. Stunning but true.

Although I call 2011 the Year of Loss, I should call it the Year of God’s Love. It was through loneliness that I turned to Him and began to feel the love of God and His presence. And reading the Scriptures, especially the Psalms, cemented my deep knowledge of His love. This began a great faith-building in my relationship with God. In the midst of it I wished for relief; today I thank God for that difficult season that pointed me to Him. He was there all the time.

Friend, heed the words of the psalms: God is our rock and our refuge, our fortress, our deliverer. He loves and delights in you so much that he rescued you. Embrace that love.

Don’t hold back. Hang on to Him, and give Him all of yourself. Your life will never be the same.

Questions for Reflection:

1. Have you experienced the joy of immersing yourself in the Psalms? They are filled with hope and the love of God, even as the psalmists share their pain. Try Psalms 42 and 43 for hope and Psalm 136 for God’s unfailing love. Enjoy!

2. God’s Word is the strongest force for a clear knowledge that God is there, in the midst of all that you experience. Deuteronomy 31:6 promises He is with us and will give us courage. Isaiah 41:10 reminds us not to fear because He is with us. And Matthew 28:20 tells us Jesus will be with us until the end of the age. Enjoy the eternal hope God gives us!