In the Silence...He Speaks
I sat there at my laptop with tears streaming down my face. I cried out to God asking Him what He wanted me to do.
I felt lost.
Disconnected.
Estranged.
From Him.
It had been so long since I felt this way. I really searched for a more creative way to say this, but I didn’t like it one bit. And why would I? Not only could I not encourage myself out of my funk. But, also, I didn’t know how I could encourage others when I didn’t feel Him as closely as I normally do when I sit down to write.
The weight of everything I had been dealing with was quite literally crushing me. I felt as though my five-foot-nothing frame would give way at any moments notice…and I was already sitting down.
I pleaded with Him to give me something. Because, yet another person had reached out to me to tell me how I had encouraged them. And I needed to hear it to know that I was on the right track. So, I knew I needed to keep going even with my current emotional state. But how?? I was stuck, six feet deep, in quick-dry cement.
And I kept crying to Him asking Him, “What am I supposed to say?”
And just in that moment, a silence so deafening fell over my entire house. And this was weird because not even seconds before, the sound of some television show my son was watching was venting it’s way under the crack of the guest room door. I couldn’t hear my children. Just silence. And in that silence I heard, “Practice to be silent.”
And I didn’t understand His response. Because if I’m asking Him what I’m supposed to say, why on earth would he tell me to be silent?
And that’s when I realized that it is during my silence that God’s voice is the loudest. That is when I can hear Him so clearly.
And as much as He is okay with my tears and crying to Him, I can’t hear Him when I do. Don’t get me wrong at all. He wants us to bring our pain to Him. It’s in that moment that He can wrap His arms around us and minister and speak strength to us. But, it’s only when we are finally silent that He is able to speak to us.
Do you ever realize when you call your best friend about something and you tell them what’s hurting you, you’re crying…maybe a little bit belligerent? But, when they start to talk to you, you stop crying as much. You get calmer. This is how we need to be with God.
Cry it out.
Then listen.
And what are we listening for?
The “why?”
The “what?”
We’re listening for what God wants us to learn through this hard time. Because if you’ve learned anything from following this blog, you should have learned that every trouble, every tear, every bad day, every hard time has it’s purpose.
And when we are finally quiet and He speaks, we may not get the answer that we wanted to hear. But He will always answer. If we are only silent long enough to hear Him speak!
So, if you are waiting to hear God speak maybe it’s time you practice to be silent.
Silence the noise of your disappointments.
Silence the crowd of friends you keep around.
Silence the social media commentators.
Silence the voice of your insecurities and fears.
Silence the things that are causing you not to hear God’s voice.
Because He is speaking. He is always there. But are we listening? Or is our environment too loud to hear Him?
We can only hear Him when we practice to be silent.
Speak, Lord. I’m listening.
