Is it love? Or is your relationship a sham?
1 Corinthians 13:4-7:
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
You go on dates regularly, spending time with your partner offline and online. You talk almost constantly, sharing your thoughts and emotions. You engage in the activities that couples do to nurture their relationship. Yet, despite all this, a nagging doubt lingers in your mind – is it love?
You find yourself questioning the authenticity of your feelings. The anxiety creeps in, making you wonder if the connection you share is genuine. Thoughts swirl in your head, and you cannot shake off the uncertainty. Is this relationship built on true love, or is it merely familiarity and routine?
Perhaps the constant communication is fueling your doubts. You talk 24/7, but are the conversations deep and meaningful? Or are they just a way to fill the silence, creating a false sense of intimacy?
The routine of regular dates may also contribute to your unease. Are you going through the motions without genuine emotional investment? The fear of settling into a comfortable but superficial routine haunts you, raising questions about the substance of your relationship.
To gain reassurance, look for other signs of love.
Love, as defined in the Bible, is patient and kind, not envious or boastful.
For instance, when your partner takes the time to listen to your concerns without rushing or interrupting, that is a sign of love. It is kind, seen in small acts like offering a comforting word or doing something thoughtful without expecting anything in return.
Love is not envious or boastful, so when your partner genuinely celebrates your successes and supports your goals without jealousy, it reflects true love.
It is not arrogant or rude and does not insist on its own way. Love rejoices in the truth, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.
Love bears all things by standing together through challenges and difficulties. It believes in all things by trusting in the goodness of the other person, fostering a positive and supportive environment. Love hopes all things, creating a sense of optimism and shared dreams for the future.
Love is also evident when you see the absolute worst side of your partner and still find the capacity to love them. It is the comforting embrace during a storm, holding each other's hands and calming each other down. Love is demonstrated when you prioritize your partner's well-being even when you are overwhelmed by negative thoughts about yourself. It goes beyond the surface, such as dates, communication, and appearance.
So, is it love? If so, then, that is great. There is nothing you should worry about anymore. All you need to do is continue strengthening your connection and allow God to lead you in your relationship.
But what if you do not see these signs of love in your relationship?
In this case, it might be better to let go. Staying with someone who does not manifest patience, kindness, or selflessness can lead to ongoing anxiety. Holding on to a relationship lacking in support, respect, and genuine care may not be worth the emotional toll it takes.
Letting go does not mean failure; it means prioritizing your emotional well-being. Choosing a path that leads to a relationship where you feel valued and supported is a healthier choice than enduring constant doubt and anxiety with the wrong person.
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